Ifind a home
by ThinkingOfANameIsHard
Summary: Sam leaves Seattle and stumbles into a new life. only to find what shes been running from. Seddie. Rated T because. . .well you never know what might happen.
1. realization

**Sam's POV**

OK so I'm not one to get all mushy and I definitely don't weir my heart my sleeve. But that doesn't mean I'm cold and don't feel. In fact lately I've been having some really strong feelings. OK so maybe not just recently these feelings have been gnawing at me for some time now. But it wasn't till recently that I was able to admit that I . . . Well I like Freddie Benson. Ya let's not make a big deal out of it, it is what it is. The day I came to this realization was the day of our Icarly Prom Night Party Night, which was on our real prom day

* * *

><p><em>(Flash Back)<em>

"Hey Gibby you got your hair done up all special again." Carly said as Gibby walked into the studio dressed all fancy in his 'grandfather's tux' smelling like cheap aftershave.

"Ya my grandpa did it when I went to pick up my tux." Gibby said wile pulling on his right lapel.

"Where's Tasha?" Carly asked.

"She needed more time to get ready so she's not going to make it for the show. But I'm gonna pick her up before we go to dinner." Gibby Answered.

"Aahh we were suppose to introduce our dates on the show"

"I Know, but she wasn't ready"

Carly and Gibby then starter arguing after Carly called Tasha a flake. I stopped listening when I heard the the elevator open. I looked over to see Feddnub stepping out with the grungy mutt that he called his date following close behind. She was tall with bleach blond hair and an IQ of about four. Freddie motioned for her to go to the back room where Carly and My's dates already were. As soon as she rounded the corner I look to Freddie.

"What do you even see in that girl?" I asked.

"Since when do girls need the Sam Puckett stamp of approval before I can date them?" he shot back.

"Dude that girl's an idiot. It's a miracle she made it to the back room without getting lost." I said harshly.

"What do you even care?"

I continued not even bothering to acknowledge his question, but allowing my voice to get more aggressive. "and she's only about as big around as my pinkie!"

"YOU KNOW WHAT SA . . .!"

Freddie was interrupted by Carly yelling "Guys stop!" both of our attention shot to her "We have a show to do let's get ready" she let her voice mellow by the end.

Freddie turned to his tech-cart obeying Carly like always wile angrily shaking his head at me. After that the show went off without a hitch, except Gibby had to leave early to pick up Tasha so we wouldn't be late for our dinner reservations.

We were outside of the Cheesecake Warehouse waiting for Gibby. I was standing with my date who was a tall soccer player by the name of Terry. He had short brown hair and a very athletic build. He was cute but he seemed a little more interested in the ruffles on my dress than the actual girl in it. Carly's date, Jacob, seemed to be ignoring her too but I think the thrill of the night kept her from noticing. I coat the nub looking at me out of the corner of my eye, but when I looked at him he seemed to be more interested in his shoes than any thing else. Meanwhile his date was clueless, tracking a peace of fuzz in the air or something. I wasn't really paying attention to the stupid toothpick. Why did the nub even ask her to prom any way.

"Hey we're here!" Gibby announced breaking me from my thoughts.

"Good." Carly said turning the hostess. "We're all here."

"Please come this way." the hostess said in a bored tone.

We followed the short stubby hostess to a long table with three chairs on each side and one on ether end. Carly and Gibby sat at the heads of the table with there dates to there left. I sat at one corner on Carly's right and Freddifer sat in the opposite corner on Gibby's right. Our dates were seated at the middle of the table across from each other.

Throughout the meal my date still seemed to barely acknowledge my existence, which was annoying but not nearly as much as freddnub and his rocket scientist acting all cutesy. I don't even know why I noticed, but she was hanging all over him laughing at his stupid nerd jokes, which I know she didn't get, and at one point she even started feeding him. Ya feeding him, like he couldn't handle it himself. Between my dates trip to la la land, the nub and his bean pole and Gibby flirting with Carly cross the table I had, had enough. . . Wait, Gibby is flirting with Carly? I shook the idea from my head 'whatever' and stood up.

"I have to go to the bathroom." i said abruptly And left the table.

"Sam?" Carly called my name questioningly, but I just ignored her and kept going.

I barged into the bathroom and made a b-line for the stall. I kept thinking 'i don't think I can take a hole night of this, why did Carly have to make me come? She knows I'm not in to this chiz.'

I heard the bathroom door open and the sound of heals clicking against the ground. I knew it was Carly coming to check on me. I guess it did seem random, me just up and leaving like that.

"Sam" called a voice that defiantly wasn't Carly. "Sam?" I cracked the stall door to find the nub's barbie Doll staring back at me.

"What?" I asked irritably stepping out of the stall. I really didn't want to talk to one of the three things that were ruining my night.

"what's your problem?" she squeaked. I was taken off guard by her question. Who does this girl think she is talking to me like that, I'm Sam Puckett the girl who can knockout a truck driver out with only a carton of milk. I'm Miss Teen Seattle, I'm the unstoppable force that makes the rules and this girl ruins my night and now she has the balls to try and call me out.

"Excuse me. . . I think your the one who's about to have a problem!" I shot back defensively. "who the hell do you think you are!"

"I'm Freddie's date"

"No derrr. And your point."

"So back off!"

"Back off? Back off from what?" what was she even talking about?

"From Freddie!" i was in shock she thought i was into Freddie and jealous of her. "I see the way you've been looking at him all night. plus the the way you would squirm in your seat when we would touch. . . and that big scene you made At the table when you came here. I know that was because of Freddie and me." I must have been in shock because I couldn't think of anything to stay back. My mind was racing around trying to comprehend her accusations. "Face it if Freddie wanted to be here with you, he would have asked you to prom not me. So just get over it and back off." she turned and speed out the door before I had a chance to say anything.

I guess that girl is dumber than I thought. I mean she really thinks that I wanted to go to prom with him. He's a nub, no he's more than just a nub he's Freddie the king of all that is nubby. And Terry asked me to prom before Freddie asked that spunk-bag. So it's not like I was waiting around for him or anything. What am I doing, he's Freddie, he doesn't deserve this time and energy. I mean ya sure he's not the weak little tech nerd he used to be. He has gotten a lot taller and he is the only guy that really ever stands up to me and truth be told he is kind of cute and he can be funny when he doesn't try to hard. SHIT. I do like him. When the hell did that happen.

* * *

><p>The rest of the night didn't get much better, with me finding my date making-out with the captain of his soccer team; on top of my . . . Realization over the nub. Altogether the night just sucked. And what might you ask did I do with this realization of mine . . . Nothing, absolutely nothing, it was all business as usual. I woke-up in the morning, went to school (most of the time) and did Icarly every week. Thing seemed normal, or at lest that's how I hope they seemed to everyone else. But in my head I was losing it. Whenever I saw the nub I would start daydreaming and thinking of us together and the more I thought the more I started to like him and the idea of us together. The hole thing was way to . . . Girly. But finally after about five weeks of this I came to the conclusion I had to tell him. But how am I suppose to tell him. I just walk up and say 'hey Freddie I've fallen for you and your all I think about most of the day. You want to go out some time.' ya that will work. (note the dramatic sarcasm)<p> 


	2. disclaimer

Ok so for my first chapter I forgot to put a disclaimer and odds are I will forget again. So I am dedicating this chap. to being the one and only disclaimer for this story.

Disclaimer: Ok so lets be real. Anyone who posts a story on here is a thief, myself included. But if you must hear. . .er. . . read it anyway here you go, I do not own Icarly.

So there you go my disclaimer. If you like this story let me know. Till next time, farewell my den of thieves.

P.S. In the next chapter I put in a quote from the movie Tropic Thunder. And I think we should play a little game. Who ever is the first one to tell me what the line is, I will write you in to a chapter. Good luck to you.


	3. Graduation Day

Sam's POV

The past few weeks have not been fun. Half the time I'm abscessing about how to tell the nub how I feel and the rest of the time I deal with my mom and her 'special' friends. Not to mention that school is ending and I have no idea what I'm going to do with myself after that. But I do know what Fredhead is going to do. He is going to the University of Pennsylvania. Which only adds to my confusion. I mean whats the point of telling him if he's just going to leave in the fall, and Carly has been no help. Its not like I told her that I like Freddie. But I've never even had the chance. Ever since prom shes been all over Jacob. She fallows him around like a lost puppy. I haven't even seen her in the past three days except for at school on Friday. If you ask me the guys a total nub and not the cute kind. And there it is, no matter what I'm thinking about it always comes back to Freddifer and how the nerd is cute or tall or how his eyes . . . Whatever you get what I'm saying. Who am I kidding I can't just not tell him. I can't let him leave without knowing how I feel, god I'm such a girl!

One somewhat positive thing about Carly not being around is it leaves me and Freddie alone most of the time. Don't get me wrong I like spending time with him, it's just that doesn't happen often. I mean we do wake up Spencer together and usually it's just me and him setting up messin with Lewburt, but we never just hangout. At first it seemed a little awkward, it just being the two of us, but the awkward faded and it felt comfortable. We didn't even fight as much without Carly. Don't get me wrong we still fought and when we did it was just as intense as ever. But the fights came less frequent and they felt more i don't know playful. And not just from me but from his side too. It almost seemed like we were flirting at times, but I know that wasn't happening. If we were flirting that means Freddie was flirting with me, and people don't usually flirt unless they like someone. I know Freddie doesn't like me. Who could blame him I have tortured him for most of his life, and besides he's always like Carly. But when we fight I can't help but see this look in his eye, like I'm the only person in the world right then like I'm all that matters. It's those moments that I guess give me hope that if I tell him how I feel he might understand.

Anyway, today I'm not going to worry about any of that because today is our graduation. Although usually I don't like making a big deal about things like this I'm excited. I think today is going to be a good day. Right now I'm on my way to Carly's so we can get ready together. Right as I walk into Bushwell, Lewburt started screaming at me to get off his floor. I don't want to deal with him today. I'm in a good mood and he is not going to change that, so I just shoot him a dirty look and make my way up the stairs. Soon enough I was right outside the Shay's apartment. I walk in without a knock, like always, and head for the fridge. As I reach for what looks like the last IBC I hear dainty footsteps tap down the stairs fallowed my Carly's voice, "hay Sam. when did you get here?"

"Just now." I answer turning to face her.

"Oh . . . Well I have your dress and shoes laid out in my room." she said

"Why do I have to wear a dress." I wined throwing my head back.

"Come on Sam you said you'd dress nice."

"Fine" I groaned.

"Good. OK I'm going to go start getting ready" she said all chipper.

Carly turns around and starts making her way up the stairs as I yell after her, "I'll start eating your Fat cakes"

I hear her faintly respond "OK" as her rounds the corner up the stairs. I grab the box of Fat cakes from the counter top, take three steps and flop onto the couch. I dangle the sweet fluffy snack over my head eating it the way royalty would be fed grapes. About half the box latter Carly comes rushing down the stairs putting on her jacket.

"Where are you going" I ask.

"Jacob just called. He wants to meet me at the Groove Smoothie" she answers a little to excited.

"Wait, I thought you were going to help me get ready?" I asked, but she was already out the door. What the chiz is wrong with that girl. We go all weekend without seeing each other and when it's just suppose to be the two of us for a little wile, she totally blows me off for her jank little boyfriend. And as soon as he tells her to come she listens and comes running. What the chiz is that about, I guess it's karma for all the years she did that to Freddie.

As if right on cue Fredifer walks threw the door knocking. I turn my head and the sight of him instantly brakes me from my thoughts.

"Why are you wearing your gown?" I ask with a slight chuckle.

"My mom wanted some pictures before quote 'that crazy blonde tears your gown to shreds'." he answered with an amused look on his face. "so what are you doing?"

"Just sittin, eatin fat cakes. I answered lazily looking back down to one of the last fat cakes.

"Where's Carly?"

Figures he'd ask that. "She ran out of her a second ago to go to the Groovy Smoothie."

"Jacob?"

"Yep."

"I thought you guys were going to get ready together?"

"Yeah me too. Doesn't it seem like she's been blowing use off for Jacob a lot lately."

"Well yeah, but she really likes him and he's really not that bad of a guy."

"It's not about him it's about her. She . . ." I tailed off. "Never mind."

"What"

"You wouldn't get it." how could he get it. How could he get that Carly is he only one I've ever been able to talk to. The only who ever hears me.

"Then help me get it" he said sitting next to me removing his cap from his head.

"Its just Carly is the only one I can talk to. She's just the only one who cares enough to. . ."

"Hey" Freddie interrupted me "Carly's not the only one who cares. Look I'm here right now listening. Look whether you want to believe it or not we are friends and I do care. If ever you need me I'll be there for you."

"Yeah and next fall when your in Pennsylvania if I call you'll just drop everything and come back to Seattle."

"Yes, I would. If you needed me to come back here I would be back here as fast as I could." I was shocked by what he was saying. I always knew that Freddie was a good guy, but would he really put everything on hold just to make sure I was OK. Suddenly Freddie's phone rang and he answered a text "my mom wants me to come home" he looks at me thoughtfully "you OK?"

"Y . . . Yeah, I'm fine" Freddie stood up slowly and started making his way to the door before I called out to him, "Freddie" he turns around and our eyes connect "thanks" He gives me a smirk and a little head nod and then turns and continues to his apartment.

He really does care, maybe I should tell him how I fell. Maybe he'll . . . No I said I'm not thinking about this tonight. Need to get it off my mind if I don't I know I will lose my mind. (loose reference to the new Icarly episode) I need food. I'm going to Amazing Glaze, I need some doughnuts. I leave the apartment through the elevator. As I walk through the streets i can't get the nub out of my head. Why did he have to say all that. Why did he have to be so perfect and not the kind of perfect that Melanie is, but just perfect for me. All I wanted was one day of no possibly life changing dilemma hanging over my head. I walked into the doughnut shop and the place was really busy. As much as I wanted a doughnut I hate lines even more. I was just about to leave when I saw Spencer next in line. I ran up to him. "Hay Spencer" I greeted.

"Oh, hey Sam what are you doing here? I thought you and Carly were . . .," he said before I interrupted.

"Yeah what ever, buy me a doughnut."

"Ah, OK" he responded flatly. I'm pretty sure he got the message that I wasn't in the mood for talking. "Why don't you find us a table then" he suggested.

I found us a table outside with two chairs. The whether was nice today not to hot with a slight breeze. If my brain wasn't so twisted up I might of enjoyed the peacefulness of it all. Spencer sat down across from me and handed me my doughnut. I dove right in devouring half the pastry in one bite and sat back in my chair. Spencer gave me a look and tried to start up a conversation. "So how's Freddie been?" where the hell did that come from? Why would he ask me about Freddie?

"How would I know?" I asked a little defensively.

"Well you guys have been hanging out a lot ever since Carly went all Jacob crazy. And since then Freddie hasn't been coming around our place." his explanation allowed me to calm down a little. "Oh and the fact that you love Freddie and want to marry him." he said like a teasing child.

"What!" I said, trying to sound offended. "No I don't."

"Oh come on Sam don't lie to me. I can see it all over your face, when you look at him, when you fight with him and when he accepts your challenges and fights back. Your face lights up. Tell me, when have you ever felt happier then when you fight with Freddie?"

I knew exactly what to say but I couldn't find my voice. He was right but on all but one thing. There was one time that I remember being happier that when I fight with Freddie. It was when we kissed. Both our defenses were down, it was the most venerable I have ever been with anyone and it was also the safest I ever felt with anyone. It just fit, that is until the kiss ended and the awkward seeped in. "your right I like Freddie." I said barely above a whisper.

"OH MY GOD REALLY!" he screamed. "I was totally bluffing." he continued at a lower volume.

"What, you said you could see it in my face!"

"Well I mean your face does change when you two fight and stuff, but I didn't know what it meant. I can't believe you like Freddie."

I started to get up. I need to get out of here. I can't deal with Spencer's special brand of crazy right now. But he reaches across the table and holds me back.

"OK, OK, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make a joke." I hesitate before I decide to stay. "so how long have you felt like this." I didn't answer. "come on Sam you can tell me"

"A few weeks" I sad flatly.

"Weeks? Well clearly you haven't told Freddie yet. Am I right?"

"No I haven't told him"

"Why?"

"I don't know, I guess I just don't see the point." Spencer gives me a questioning look. "I mean if I tell him best case scenario we date. But then we just have the summer and he goes off to college."

"I don't think your giving Freddie enough credit. You don't know how much he cares about you."

Memory's from earlier flashed in my head. "I think I have a pretty good idea."

"Really" he said almost accusingly. " So you know that every time he trys to act tough or dangerous or he stands up to you, he's tying to impress you. And you've noticed that whenever he talks about you he gets lost in some other world where you're the only one that matters. And not to mention the whole Missy thing."

"What Missy thing?" my eyebrows jumped to the top of my forehead.

"Freddie's the one who sent her away."

"No Missy won that cruse"

"Freddie won and gave it to her for you. So don't think he would give you up to easily" Spencer looks at his watch. "OK kid I got to go. Just think about what I said." and with that Spencer takes his first bite of doughnut and walks away.

Maybe I've been making this to complicated. I mean he does seem to care and he even told me that he did. Really I can't stand not knowing. OK what am I saying? Why am I being such a wimp about this? I just need to go up to him and say you an me is goin on a date, that's just the way it is. That's it I'm going now. I stand up and start running back to Bushwell plaza. I need to get there before I lose my nerve. Before I knew it I was running down the hall on the eighth Floor I turn the corner and stand in front of Freddison's door. I knock twice and crazy answered almost instantly. "is Freddie here?" I ask quickly.

"no he's across the hall an. . ." I don't wait for her to finish before I run into the shays apartment. I run up the stairs knowing that he would be in the studio. I walk down the last hallway, stop before I reach the door and take one last deep breath, trying to calm my self. I face the glass door, look into the room and stop. I see Carly and Freddie sitting on the hood of the car very close. Freddie has his arm around her shoulders and there faces are only inches apart. It looks like they are about to kiss. Then as if jumping out of my brain and into reality. Carly closes the gap. She snakes her arm around his back and his free hand cradles the back of her neck. I quickly turn away from the door so I couldn't be seen. What the hell was I thinking of course he likes Carly, he's always been in love with her. But what's up with her. She has a boyfriend and then she goes after the guy i like. I start to make my way down the stairs. Stupid Spencer, making me think me and Freddie had a chance. One tear rolled down my face. I stopped at the end of the stairs and wiped my tear away. I looked down to the wet spot on my hand. This is to much I . . . I have to get out of here. I start to run. I have to get out of this apartment, out of this building, out of this city. I just need to go find something, anything, anywhere. Something away from here, somewhere new.


	4. On The Road

**Sam's POV**

I left yesterday, took the little money I had saved and bought a ticket on the first train out of Seattle. So far life on my own sucks I'm tired, hungry and this train smells like old people. But this is what I have to do. There's nothing left for me in Seattle. My best friend can't even make time for me, the guy I want doesn't want me and the two of them just hooked up. So I just need to start over.

There's some old guy staring at me. "What's your deal?" I ask as more of a 'get the chiz away form me' than an actual question.

"What are you running from?" he asked boldly.

"Who says I'm runnin" I shoot back.

"Well your alone, have only one bag so you only took what you can carry, and you're on a bus that leads to practically nowhere. I bet you thought of a thousand reasons to leave. But what was the straw that broke the camels back? I bet it was a boy."

I shift uncomfortably in my seat. He can tell all that from just looking at me. Who is this guy? "So what if I am runnin. What's it to you?"

"Oh I suppose your right. It's none of my business. I was just wondering what a pretty, young girl could possibly be running form that was worse than starting a new life on her own. I mean it gets lonely out here on the road."

"I'll be fine."

"Oh no doubt, from what I can tell your a very Strong young laddie."

"What about you? You talk about it bein lonely out here on the road. What are you runnin from?"

"You know, I don't even know anymore. I've been running for so long that I can't remember what it's like to just live in one place." the look on his face turns sad for a moment. I can tell that he wants to continue so I stay quite. " I'm going to give you a little advice and I hope you take it. Find a place you can call home. Hold on to it, fight for it. Because this, this is no life, not for anyone." the train slows to a stop. The man stands up. "Well this is my stop. Good luck . . . you know, in life." the man walks down the isle and off the train.

We pull away from the station. The mans voice echos in my head 'Find a place you can call home.' a few minutes down the track I start to feel even more tired. Before I knew it I was asleep.

* * *

><p><strong>Freddie's POV<strong>

OK, now I'm getting worried. Yesterday I talked to Sam after she told me about how she felt about Carly ditching us for Jacob, after she said she was OK but she still looked like she had a lot on her mind. I left and that was the last I've seen of her she even missed graduation and I know she was really looking forward to it.

"Hey this is Sam. Leave me a message or not I don't care." and her phone goes strait to voicemail EVERY TIME! Come on Sam where the hell are you? Maybe Carly has heard something. I run across the hall and right into her apartment. She is sitting at the counter doing something on the computer.

"Hey have you heard from Sam yet?" I ask as I approach her. She turns in her chair and looks at me.

"No, you?" she asks.

"No, I called her like a million times but it just goes to voicemail."

"Don't weary she probably just forgot to charge her phone." Carly says placing a comforting hand on my shoulder. But as soon as she realized were her hand was she pulled away and turned to the computer. Things between me and Carly have been a little awkward ever since last night.

* * *

><p><em>(FLASHBACK)<em>

After I talked to Sam I went back to my apartment, only to be attacked with disinfectant spray. Once I was able to wrestle the can from my mom I retreated to my room. I changed out of my gown and started working on the newest Icarly update. About ten minutes in I remembered the real reason I went over to Carly's in the first place. I needed one of the severs to finish the update. So I ran back over to Carly's, dodging my mom along the way. I entered the apartment expecting Sam to still be in the same spot but the apartment looked empty. I figured she'd be in the Icarly studio. But when I got to the studio only Carly was there, sitting on the hood of the car and it look like she had been crying. I slowly walked into the room, and cleared my throat to make my presence known. Carly looked up and saw me but didn't let our eyes meet. She sat up strait, wiped the tears from here eyes and tried to keep from crying. I sat next to her on the car.

"Hey, what's up? Are you OK?" I asked softly.

"Jacob . . . Dumped me." she barely squeaked out. She started to break down and cry again. I put my arm around her and pulled her to my chest in a hug to try and comfort her. After a little wile she was able to stop crying. She sat back but I kept my arm around her.

"What happened?" I asked trying to be sensitive to the subject.

"I don't know. He said he wanted to meet me at the Groovy Smoothie. So I went and when I got there he just said 'I think we should break up sorry.' and then he left." she started to cry again but softer than before. I pulled her into another hug. After a little more time she pulled back slightly, wiped the tears away and looked at me for the first time. "thank you Freddie. For you know, just being here." our faces were only inches apart. Suddenly her expression changed from sad to almost lustful. Her eyes shifted from mine to my lips then recaptured my gaze. Before I knew what was happening her lips were on mine. 'Oh my god! I'm kissing Carly' I thought. I almost instinctively responded. I wrapped my hand around the back of her neck deepening the kiss, as if eight years of pent up passion just came flooding out. This felt so . . . Wrong. This isn't right. What am I doing? I broke the kiss and turned away. "What's wrong?" she asked a pleading sound in her voice as if wanting anything but to be rejected again.

"I'm sorry. I . . . Carly it's not you. I shouldn't have . . ." I said before she interrupted me.

"No, it was me. It's just my heads all mixed up right now and you were being so nice. And your still being nice. I mean you stopped because you knew I wasn't ready for that and. . ."

"Actually that's not why I stopped."

"Then why'd you stop"

"I don't know. Whatever. Let's just forget it."

"Freddie" she said in a freakishly calm voice. "Tell me."

"I don't have the same feeling for you anymore. I'm in L . . . I like Sam.


	5. Big Trees and Crazy People

**Sam's POV**

I woke up to find a ceramic cat staring at me from the bedside table. Late last night I found a small little bed and breakfast. I was unbelievably tired from walking all day. I didn't have enough money for another train ticket so I started walking. The night before I stayed at this motel named the orchard inn. The place had paint chipping off the walls and the ceiling leaked so I was definitely in a hurry to get out of that place. After a short ride from a skinny truck driver named Hamhock. I was left on the side of the road near a field when Hamhock tried to get handsy and earned himself a black eye. So I walked and walked and walked and after about fifteen hours I found the bed and breakfast that I'm waking up in now. I roll over to my back and let out a long yawn. I had a dream last night. It was about Freddie. God! I need to stop thinking about him. This is a new life. One where I don't have friends who just leave me hangin or stupid nubs that are obsessed with the same little miss perfect all the time. Yes, so I'm done thinking about it. That's it, no more. What's for breakfast?

After a shower and a clean set of cloths, I go down stairs. The smell of pancakes meets me halfway down. I walk to the kitchen to find the old lady that showed me to my room last night. I knock on the open door to get her attention. She turns and in the sweetest voice says "oh good, your up. I'm just getting done with breakfast. If you want to go sit down in the dinning room there's some orange juice. You can pour your self a glass wile I finish up. I'll just be a minute." I nod my head in agreement and quietly make my way to the dinning room. I pour the juice and grab one of the muffins, with the biggest blue berries I have ever seen, from the middle of the table. About a minute and a half later the lady enters the dinning room with a big silver tray filled with pancakes, fruit, eggs, toast, hash brows and a full plate of bacon. My mouth starts to water. All the food looks so good. She sets the tray on the table and sits down. I dig in, starting with the bacon. "So how are you this morning?" she asks.

"I'm fine," I say with a mouth full of bacon.

"Good, you know you got in so late last night we didn't have a chance to be properly introduced. My names Leah." she said offering me her hand.

I shook he hand and introduced my self. "I'm Sam"

"Well nice to meet you Sam. So if you don't mind me asking what brings you out here? Family?"

"No, no family around here."

"Oh well I just assumed. Most people don't usually come around these parts unless they got family near by."

"Yeah well not me" I say only half paying attention as I move on to the eggs.

"So were ya headed?"

"I don't know. I've kind of almost run out of money."

"How much do ya have?"

"About ten bucks"

"Oh so your gonna need a job?"

"Yeah I guess."

"Well I'd offer you one here but I don't get many costumers. I just do his on the side, to you know meet travelers, and share stories that kind of thing. You know what though I think I know someone who might be able to help you. His name is nick. He owns the diner in town. After breakfast we'll go I to town and see."

"Yeah thanks." After breakfast she cleans the plates wile I gather my bag and the few other things I owned. I wait in the living room till Leah is done and we can go. We get in to her old bug and she takes off toward town without even giving me a chance to find a seat belt. The drive is long and boring. There's not even anything to look at but farmland. Except for a house in the distance. Behind the house stand giant trees that seemed to go on forever. On the right side of the house there was a big barn. "What's that over there?" I ask letting my curiosity fill the silence.

"Oh, that's the Newman's land. They're good people, a little weird and crazy at times, but good people." as we pass the house I see it in more detail. It is a big two-story home. Blue shutters frame all the windows and a porch runs all the way around the house. In the middle sits a large burgundy door and a large chimney shoots up from the center of the roof. The barn that stands off to one side is white with two huge doors that take up almost the whole front of it.

"What do they do there? I ask.

"You see all those walnut trees? I nod to answer. "That's all their land." I watch as the beautiful big house disappears behind us. Not long after a small town starts to come into view. We pass a sign that says 'welcome to Cherryville'. The town is small. I mean really small, I could probably throw a rock from one side to the other. Most of the buildings were made of brick and really old, but the town was nice. The people around here obviously really take care of their town. In the middle of the town sits a small diner with a large sign above the door that says 'Nick's'. We walk into the diner and the inside is tinny. It seats maybe thirty people if you don't mind sitting shoulder to shoulder with the person next to you. Leah calls out to the back. "Nick were you at!"

"What?" a voice chimes out.

"Get out here!" I'm surprised by Leah's tone. It's a lot different from the sweet old lady I met this morning.

"Oh not you. Who let you in here." a man says coming out from the kitchen.

"Well if you think your man enough, why don't you come show me out?"

"Maybe I will." he says walking toward us. He reaches out and grabs Leah's hand. My instincts kick in and I start to move to the large man ready to stand up for the lady who made me bacon this morning. But I stop when I see him bring the back of her hand to his lips and plant a gently kiss. "How have you been Leah?" the man asks in a much kinder voice than before.

"Oh just about the same as always" she answers in her more natural tone.

"Yeah, you sill trying to run that little B&B without customers."

"As a matter of fact, I had a costumer last night." she says with pride. "Nick I would like you to meet Sam." she motions to me.

"Nice to meet you Sam"

"Yeah" was my only reply.

"Sam is passing through and seems to have run a little low on cash. I was hoping you could set her up with a job for the day." Leah says

"Come on don't put me on the spot like that." watching them go back and forth like that was fun. It was good to be part of a little real human interaction.

"Nick comes on. Please for me?" those last words she said, why did she have to chose those words. I managed to get this far into the day without thinking about Carly and Freddie, but the three simple words 'please for me' stirs up images of them. Before I know it the image of them kissing flashes throw my head again and again. It feels like I just got punched in the chest, but my train of thought get interrupted by Leah. "Sam are you OK? Nick said he'd let you work the day."

"O . . . OK good. Thanks." I stutter still realign from the mental pictures.

"OK Sam, ill be back at the end of your shift to pick you up you can stay another night with me but this time it's on the house." I got ready to protest staying another night but she left before I had a chance, calling back a goodbye as the door closed behind her. I turn to Nick who tosses me an apron.

"You can go ahead and start takin orders." he said before returning to the kitchen.

The workday went fast. I got three orders wrong and dropped two plates but other than that it went smoothly. When I was done Nick grabbed about seventy bucks from the register and handed it to me. He also told me that Leah called and said her car wouldn't start. So I had to walk all the way back to the bed and breakfast.

I grab my bag and start the long walk back. As soon as I'm out of the town I look out at the road it curves around in a big horseshoe, so I decide to cut through the fields and save some time. The sun is starting to set. Walking alone, my mind starts to wonder and of course it goes to the same place it always goes, the nub. The more I think about it the angrier I get. Freddie always went after Carly. He never even had a real girlfriend just so he could be ready to date Carly at the drop of a hat. It makes me sick to think that after all the time he spent worshiping her they're now together. And Carly can probably get him to do anything just by snapping her fingers.

Next thing I know, the sun is fully set and I'm surround by trees. I must be on the Newman's land. I walk over to a low hanging branch and pick a walnut. After fighting with it for about ten minutes I finally am able to crack the shell and eat the nut. Out of nowhere a loud high-pitched scream breaks the silence of the night. I look around, but I can't see much in the darkness. I here a voice yell "help!" I see someone in the distance lying on the ground. I run over to them. As I get closer I see that it is a young girl about thirteen years old.

"Are you OK? What happened?" I ask slightly out of breath.

"I don't know, my leg hurts and I don't think I can walk." she says as I start to help her sit up. " My horse through me. Then ran off."

"OK ahhh . . ." I look around in the night. I have no idea where I am. "Do you know how to get home?"

" Yeah, it's that way" she points through an isle of trees. "The trees would lead you right to it."

"OK, I'll help you walk let's go." I help her up and pull her right arm over my shoulder and we start to walk through the trees.

"Thank you for this. My name Tara."

"Don't mention it and my name is Sam."

"What are you doin out here anyway? I mean not that I'm not grateful, but why."

"I was cutting through on my way ho . . ." I paused. This is the first time I realized I don't have a home. I choke back the feelings of insecurity and sadness. "I was going to the bed and breakfast down the road."

"Oh, you're staying with Leah?"

Before I had a chance to reply, a loud woman's voice called out. "Tara, Tara what happened to you?"

"I'm OK mom I just hurt my leg when River though me."

"Let's get you inside. I'll call the doctor." The lady, that apparently was Tara's mom, took Tara from me and started walking her toward the porch steps. I hear a thundering sound behind me. I turn around to see a man trotting up on a horse pulling another smaller horse behind him. He stops a few feet away from me and looks down from his horse.

"Your new." He says flatly.

"Yeah" I say matching his tone.

Tara turns and speaks from the porch steps. "Oh yeah, that's Sam. She's the one who found me."

The man looks at me for a moment before the talks. "Well Sam. I think that earns you a steak."

"Just one steak?" I ask allowing my usual boldness to come through.

The man smiles. "I like you. My name is Jeff, Jeff Newman . . ." he is cut off by Tara's mom.

"Excuse me but your daughter may have a broken leg here."

"Well what do you want me to do about it? Call the doctor." he shoots back. Tara chuckles at her parents and gives a look that says that this is a common thing for them.

Jeff motions for me to go to the house, and me never being one to turn down a steak, I fallow right behind Tara and he mom. We enter the kitchen through the back of the house. The kitchen is long with counter top along the back wall, a sink in the middle. Above the sink is a window. On the opposite side of the kitchen is a fridge and a walk-in pantry. A long table sits in the middle of the room. Tara is helped to the next room. The next room is a living area with two large couches set in an L Shape and a recliner on one side. A large wooden coffee table sits between the furnisher and it all sits on a giant rug. The staircase leading up is behind the middle couch leading to the front door. Tara is set down on the middle couch.

"So how dose it feel? Dose it hurt?" Tara's mom asks clearly concerned.

"No only if I put weight on . . ." her mom smacking her in the back of the head interrupted Tara.

"What were you thinking taking that horse out when it's dark?" Tara's mom says turning to grab the phone. "You know kid some times I don't know what to do with you." she takes the phone in the other room to call the doctor.

Tara looks at me. "Sorry about my parent. There a little crazy."

"Its OK. They're nothing compared to my mom." just then Jeff walked in the front door. He walks over and looks at Tara.

"How you doin baby?" he asks.

"I'll live." she replies shrugging her shoulders. Jeff looks at me.

"Let's go see about that steak," he says pointing to the kitchen. He fixes me up a steak and some leftover mashed potatoes. As I start to dig in I hear a knock on the front door Tara's mom answers it, and the doctor walks in. After I finish my food I look over and see the doctor gathering his things. I walk into the living room right as he leaves.

"Is everything OK?" I ask.

"Yeah, doc says I just sprained my knee." Tara says.

"OK good. So I guess I'll just be going."

"It's Sam right?" Tara's mom says, finally acknowledging me. "My name is Jennifer. So, are you visiting family around here, or just passin through?"

"She's stayin with Leah." Tara says.

"Yeah, I'm just passin through" I add.

"Oh, how did you hear about Leah's little B&B?" Jenifer asks.

"I actually just came across it yesterday and stayed the night."

"Well it's getting pretty late why don't you stay here for the night. I'll call Leah to let her know."

"No, I should . . ." I tried to say but was cut off.

"I insist. It's the lest we could do for you finding Tara." I stop and think for a moment. If I stay here I wouldn't have to walk all the way past here again when I leave in the morning. And maybe I could get another steak for breakfast, with some eggs.

"OK, yeah I'll stay"

"Well OK then I'll go call Leah. Jeff, why don't you show Sam to her room."

"OK, Sam this way" Jeff motions for me to follow him. He leads me up stairs and half way down a hall. He opens a door to a room. "Here you go. If you need us we'll be at the end of the hall. And if you need food or water you know were the kitchen is." I nod, enter the room and lay on the bed. I just now realize how tired I am and before I have a chance to get back up I fall asleep.

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><p>I love reviews so let me know what you think.<p>

P.S. I will try to get the next chapter up faster.


	6. A Helping Hand and New Problems

**Freddie's POV**

Sam has been gone for days now. Carly has started getting really worried. I've been worried about Sam but Carly is worried about me too. I guess I haven't been taking he best care of myself since Sam disappeared, but how can I worry about myself when I don't even know where Sam is. Yesterday I went to her house to ask her mom were she was, but her mom didn't even know she was gone. Right now I'm on my way to see if Melanie has heard from her sister. I guess her school is out of cell phone range so she doesn't even have one. That is why I have to do this in person. Pulse Sam might be there. I don't know where else Sam would have gone. I called any relatives of Sam's I could but most of them just screamed something about me not having a warrant and then asked me for money.

It may seem weird that I'm hunting her so passionately, but you need to under stand this was the summer that I tell her how I feel. About what has always been there even before I noticed it. This was going to be my time to take charge to put it all on the line. I had planed what I was going to say over and over again to make sure it was all perfect. So it didn't sound to sappy because Sam doesn't like sappy. To make sure that when we eventually wind up fighting like we do, I can steer the argument to the exact words I want to say. But she is gone now and the fact that she may be alone or in some kind of trouble over shadows the fact that I don't get to tell her everything I feel. If I had to live with the pain of not telling her just so she would come back I would.

I pull up to Melanie's school it is huge and busy. There are people everywhere moving boxes and small furnisher. The seniors must be clearing out for the end of school. I hope Melanie is still here. I go to the information office and fight with the lady behind the counter about whether or not I'm trustworthy enough. After about ten minutes of that I decide that I would have more luck finding her on my own. So I leave the office and start asking around. One hour and fifty people later, I finally find the dorm were she lives. I have to sneak in the back, because apparently there are no boys aloud in the girl's dorm. Eventually I find a door on the second floor that says 'Puckett & Stevens' I knock on the door and a girl with red hair and a small patch of freckles on her nose answers the door. "Can I help you?" the girl, that I assume is the Stevens in Puckett & Stevens, asks.

"Yeah, I'm looking for Melanie Puckett." I say.

"And who are you?"

"I'm Freddie'

"You got a last name Freddie?"

"Stacey its fine." Melanie says opening the door so I can see her and the rest of the room. "Hey Freddie what are you doing here?" she asks as she pulls me into a hug. I am stunned for a moment. I didn't take in to account the fact that Melanie and Sam are identical twins. For a moment it feels like Sam is back. But that feeling quickly fades. Looking at her just doesn't give me the same spark as when I look at Sam.

"Hey Mel," I try to say cheerfully. "I was actually wondering if you have heard from Sam lately."

"No, why, what's going on?" Melanie says concern filling her voice.

"She disappeared during graduation and no one has seen her since."

"Oh my god. So she didn't leave a note or anything." I shake my head. "What about her phone . . ."

"It just goes strait to voice mail." I say over the top of her question.

"Did you call the police?"

"Yeah they said, since she's eighteen and there's no sign that she was taken there is nothing they can do and given her track record they say she probably just left.

"Did you call any of my family?"

"Yeah, everyone, well everyone who wasn't in salutary. Is there anywhere else you can think that she might be? Anywhere she might go."

"No, nowhere."

"OK well thanks anyway." This was just another waste of time. I wave and turn to walk away but Melanie stops me.

"Freddie I want to come with you. To look for Sam."

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah, I mean she's my sister. If she's in some kind of troubled I have to help her." she turns back to her roommate. "Sorry Stacey but it looks like I'm not going to your parents cabin.

"Yeah, of course I totally get it." Stacey says.

"Freddie would you help me grab those boxes. I'll just be a sec. i need to say goodbye to Stacey." she points to a small stack of boxes.

"OK, ill pull my car in front. Once I leave the building I don't think I can get back in so I'll just wait at the car." I grab two of the boxes and head to the car. I squeeze the boxes into the back of my tinny Honda; drive the car around to the front of Melanie's dorm and wait. About ten minutes later she comes out with three small boxes and a large bag. I run over and take the boxes from her to help. We put the small boxes in the trunk and she keeps the bag with her. We start the long ride back to Seattle and I start to catch Melanie up on the situation so far. Of course I didn't mention the part about me liking Sam. I think it is best if Sam knows first.

"Wait, I think I may know where Sam went." Melanie says out of nowhere.

"What? Where?" I asked shocked by her sudden outburst.

"When we were young she would talk about some day she would go and find our dad. She said that she wanted to know him and find out why he left." I could see that the subject of her father was tough for her to talk about. But it is the only leads we have on were Sam might be.

"Do you really think she would do that? After all this time."

"Yeah, I mean I still wonder about him. We never got a chance to know him. He left when we were just babies and our mom would never tell us about him." she wouldn't look at me wile she talked. She was almost in another world, like she was retreating into herself. I reached over and placed my hand on her shoulder to comfort her, let her know that it's OK, that I'm a friend. She looks up at me places her hand on mine and smiles.

Suddenly this feels weird. Am I having a moment with Melanie? Does Melanie still like me?

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><p><em><strong>Reviews motivate me greatly. So let me know what you think.<strong>_


	7. Little Girls and a New Job

**Sam's POV**

This morning I didn't wake up to creepy cat statues or a nasty motel. I wake up in a medium sized room with two dressers and a door that leads to a bathroom. Sunlight came through the window just at the foot of the bed. The walls were a light yellow and crown molding met the ceiling.

I can hear people talking downstairs. I realize I slept in my clothes last night. I straiten my clothes and grab my bag. Walking down stairs I can hear that one of the people talking is Tara. I don't know the other voice but it sounds young. No one is in the living room so I assume they're in the kitchen. I walk into the kitchen to see Tara with her right leg in a brace and propped up on the chair next to her. On Tara's other side sits a small girl about six years old. "Hey Sam good morning." Tara says.

"Hey" I say looking questioningly at the little girl.

"Sam this is Chris my little sister." Tara says pointing to the little girl. "Chris say hi to Sam."

"Hi" Chris says without even looking up from her coloring book.

"Hey Chris" I say but get no response back.

"There should be some Eggs and toast on the counter and I think there's a bowl of fruit in the fridge." Tara tells me.

"OK thanks." I turn to find the food. "So where are your parents."

"They both went out to tend the animals since I'm off my feet for at least two weeks." Tara says pulling on her leg brace. I grab some eggs and toast and sit across from Tara at the table. I eat slower than my usual pace. I don't know why but I'm not in a hurry to get out of here. This place in nice. I look up and see Tara and Chris staring at me.

"What, do I have something on my face?" I ask wiping at my cheeks.

"No" Tara says "you just . . . Look young. For a drifter I mean."

"I'm not a drifter."

"Well you don't live around here and your just passin through. Sounds kinda drifterish to me."

"What ever and who are you callin young anyway. Your like thirteen."

"Yeah but I'm not a drifter."

"Quit calling me a drifter. I'm not a drifter." Tara and My's 'discussion' had been getting increasingly loud, but we were interrupted by the sound of Chris laughing. I look down at the little girl.

"Your funny when you get mad." Chris says through her large grin. Funny, no one ever called me funny when I was getting mad. I've been called irritating and scary but definitely not funny. Actually the thought that I couldn't even scare a little girl is pretty funny. I couldn't help but laugh. Soon Tara joins in and the three of us are just sitting around the table laughing like idiots at nothing. Slowly the laughter died down. "I like you." Chris says mirroring her fathers words from the night before. "Your fun."

"I like you too kid." I say as I reach across the table and ruffle her hair. The three of us talk and joke for a wile. After some time I look at the clock and realize that it's been almost two hours that we've been sitting there. "Oh I should get ready for the day," I say as I get up from the table.

"Yeah me too" Chris says. She runs out of the kitchen and we hear little footsteps make there way up the stairs. I take my plate to the sink and set it down.

"So your goings to leave after you get ready." Tara says a small hint of sadness in her voice.

"Yeah, I should probably get goin." I say not making eye contact. I leave the kitchen and make my way to the room I stayed in last night. I take the last pair of clean clothes I have and start to change in the bathroom attached to the bedroom. I notice that there is another door on the other side of the bathroom. My curiosity got the best of me and I slowly cracked the door open. The room looked deserted like no one had been in it in months. The room was simple just a bed, a dresser and a closet. The closet was open and inside was guy clothes, some shirts and denim jeans. At the back was a small lock box. I thought about opening it but decided that I shouldn't push my luck and just get out of here. I go back through the bathroom, into the bedroom. I grab my bag and head for the front door. I stopped and looked around the first level of the house to say goodbye to Tara, but she was no were to be found. I go out the front door and start the log trail back to the road.

As I pass the barn I hear someone yell. "Charlie no!" the small door that sits in the middle of one of the big barn doors swings open and a large Doberman comes sprinting out right toward me. For a moment I don't know what to do. Suddenly the dog breaks stride and comes to a stop in front of me waging his little tail looking like the happiest dog in the world. Jennifer comes running out of the barn as I lean down and pet the dog. She stops a few feet away from me and just stairs at me and the dog. I look up to see her looking amazed shaking her head. "I have never seen Charlie take to anyone like that before. Usually he tries to attack strangers. I've had to pull him off of more than one person."

"Well he seems like a good dog to me." I say as he rolls over so I can scratch his belly.

"Come here Sam. I want to show you some thing," she says waving for me to follow her to the barn. I follow with Charlie at my side. We walk into the barn. Inside there are stables in the front and about half way back there's a wall that goes half way up the height of the barn. On top of the wall is a hayloft. There are three horses, each in their own stall. The stall to the right holds a very tall, very dark brown horse. The same one Jeff was riding the night before. The nameplate on the front of the stall says Allie. On the opposite side of the barn sits the other two horses. One a cream color only slightly shorter than Allie named Mary Ann. The last and shortest horse is white with brown splotches all over, this is the same horse Jeff was pulling in last night. The name River is printed on the front of the of the horses stall. Jennifer continues to lead me through the barn. We go through a door in the middle wall. Inside is a room about as big as the front of he barn. There is a tractor; several large bins on wheels and other assorted farming equipment. Jennifer leads me strait through and out the back of the barn. From the back of the barn you can see an amazing view of the walnut trees. Jennifer just stops and looks at the trees.

"So what did you want to show me?" I ask after a moment of silence.

"The grove," she says pointing to the trees. I nod and the two of us just sand there for a while. Suddenly she speaks breaking the silence. " So Where you goin Sam." a little shocked I hesitate for a moment.

"What do you mean?" was all I could reply.

"Well last night you said you were stayin with Leah. But the direction you were comin wasn't from Leah."

"Oh, Well yesterday I worked at Nick's to make a little money for my trip."

"How far do you think you'll get on that one day of work? Not everyone is as nice as Nick and Leah. You wont always find work." I stay quiet. She's right how much longer can I keep going like this. "I'll tell you what Sam, usually around this time my nephew is around to help with the harvest, but he's . . . not with us this time around." she paused for a moment. The images of the abandoned room flashed through my head. I almost asked what happened to her nephew but I stop myself. "How about you stay and help us and at the end of the harvest we'll pay you for your help." I thought about it for a little wile. I do like these people and I do need something a little more stable for a while. But I don't know anything about working on a farm and for all I know these people could be freaks.

"Why do you want to do this for me? You don't even know me." I ask.

"My girls like you." she says as if it were obvious while she points to the porch. I look over to see Tara and Chris watching me from the porch. I feel a smile stretch across my face.

"OK, I'll stay"

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><p><strong>Thank you to all who reviewed. Reviews mean the world to me. If you like the story tell me and if you don't . . . well actually you can keep that to your self. Review are are what keep me going when i get lazy. so please don't let me get lazy. <strong>

**P.S. one of my favorite character is Chris whats yours.**


	8. One Step Forward One Step Back

**Freddie's POV**

For the past week Carly, Melanie and I have been trying to track down Sam and Melanie's dad. We only had one lead so far; well we thought it was a lead. Turns out we can't trust any of their relatives because they all are ether crazy or looking for someone to bust them out of jail. Right now we are at the library, I know old school right, but a lot of the stuff we need to look for never made it to computers. Carly is checking old newspapers and I'm in the public records section. I don't know where Melanie went off to but to be honest I'm glad she's not around. I think she might have a thing for me still. So I've kind of been avoiding her all week. We've talked and went out to get food and smoothies and stuff, with Carly of course. But I'm just afraid if she starts to really like me . . . well lets just say that could get really awkward. Not to mention complicated.

Yesterday we decided to come to the library to see what we could find because were just running out of options. This is our last resort, after this we are out of ideas, so I'm really hoping this pans out. We all are really; I need to keep reminding myself that this doesn't just suck for me. Carly lost her best friend and Melanie lost her sister. I haven't talked to the girls about it but I don't think Sam is looking for her dad. She just leaves out of the blue with not so much as a goodbye. I know she is spontaneous but this just doesn't feel right. Plus the day she left she seemed sad when we talked. I think something made her leave, whatever it was had to be huge I've never seen Sam run from anything in her life. All of a sudden my thoughts are interrupted by Melanie running up to me. "Freddie! Carly found something." She said slightly out of breath.

"What, What is it" I say trying draw more information out of her.

"Just come on I'll show you." she says running toward where she came. I follow matching her speed. We enter a small room where Carly is sitting in front of a big machine looking at a newspaper slide. She turns and looks at us as we enter the room and points to the slide.

"Look what I found." I go over to the slide machine and start to read a newspaper article from Carson City Nevada. It's a story about their dad. It says, "A traveling man, Timothy Puckett, pulls local celebrity Kurt Manson from a burning car after loosing control on a dirt road and crashing into a tree, Manson, famous as lead anchor on the Channel three evening news, said, "It all happened so fast I don't remember much. But what I do remember is that he pulled me from the car. I noticed his sleeve was on fire but he just worried about getting me safe."" the article went on but I didn't continue.

"So he was in Carson City then," I say looking back at the girls.

"Yeah," Carly says. "And look at the date."

"This was right after he left." Melanie adds.

"OK now we have a lead. Looks like were going to Nevada." I say

"I'll drive." Carly says grabbing her purse.

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><p><strong>Sam's POV<strong>

I walk out the back of the house. The bright full moon lights the grove. It all looks beautiful. The night is still. A few crickets are chirping from far away. This place seems perfect. Just then I hear the rustle of footsteps on the dirt path. I look down from the top of the porch and am shocked to see Freddie. "What are you doing here?" I ask as my heart jumps a beat.

"What am I doing here? Sam what are you doing here? You left, didn't say goodbye, see ya latter, go to hell, nothing. Sam you left your home"

" It didn't feel like much of a home you guys lied to me."

"What did I lie to you about. Look I don't know what you're going through, but I want to be there for you. I told you that I want to be there for you." I can feel my hands shaking, my eyes fighting to hold back tears. I do want him to be there for me. I want him to be the one to take away all the anger, frustration and sadness, but he can't be because he is the one who causes my heart to wrench. He's the reason why I left. "Sam" I didn't realize he had climbed the steps to the porch and was standing right next to me. "Look at me Sam I'm here just like I said I would be, please let me help you. Even if that means just being here." I'm looking directly into his big brown eyes. All the feelings of heart break fall away. He places his left hand on my hip and cups my face with the other. We both move in to one another. All I can think about is the feeling of his lips. We are only a centimeter apart when all of a sudden I feel little feet jumping up and down on my bed. I'm snapped from my dream as I here the feet chanting.

"Sam wake up, Sam wake up, Sam wake up . . ." I open my eyes to see Chris hopping up and down. "Come on Sam you said that you would take me to the creek today. Saaaaammmm you promised."

"OK I'm up. Lets go eat breakfast and I'll take you to the creek"

"Yay!" she screams as she runs out of my room. I laugh to myself thinking of how she's such a little girl. Slowly my dream starts to come back to me the happy moment Chris made fades and I'm left with the familiar empty feeling. This isn't the first time I had this dream it's been happening every night for the past week, ever since I agreed to stay at the Newman's grove.

I shake the dream from my head and get up from the bed I go to the dresser and pick out some clothes. A few days ago Jennifer gave me some clothes that she said were better for working. Believe it or not I'm actually a pretty good farmhand. All last week Jennifer and Jeff have been teachin me how to take care of the horses and what to expect when its time for the harvest. Jennifer says I have a way with the animals it seems they all take to me well. I finish getting ready and head down stairs. Everyone is in the kitchen getting ready to eat. "Good morning." I say as I sit at the table.

"I see Chris was able to get you up." Jeff says with a slight chuckle.

"Yeah, she's every persuasive" I say through a yawn. Everyone lets out a small laugh.

"So when are you guys goin to the creek?" Jennifer asks as she serves up breakfast.

"I was thinkin after breakfast," I answer. "Did anyone else want to come?"

"I wish I could but I still have this stupid brace on for another week at least." Tara says bitterly. Tara has been getting more and more annoyed that she couldn't even walk. But I think it has more to do with the fact that she can't ride River.

"Its ok honey you'll be up and around before you know it." Jennifer says to her daughter then turns to me. "We can't ether. Jeff and I have to stay here to meet Joey."

"Who's Joey?" I ask.

"Joey is Tara's riding coach."

"Yeah and he's super hot." Tara adds.

"Hey don't talk like that," Jennifer scolds. Jeff starts laughing at Tara's comment. "Oh you think its funny that your thirteen year old daughter is checking out her riding coach who is three years older than her."

"Well I might be more worried if I hadn't known the boy since he was five." Jeff says. Jennifer shakes her head and continues talking to me.

"He took my nephew's horse Bear up Titans Pass last week. Bear has seemed a little depressed lately. So we thought it would be good for him." I nod my head just kind of wanting to change the subject from Jennifer's nephew. I look across the table to see Chris already finished with her breakfast.

"Hey why don't you go get your shoes on and we'll get goin." I say to Chris who doesn't waste any time running into the other room to get her shoes. I finish my breakfast and Chris and I set off. I went to this creek the other day when Jennifer was teaching me how to find my way through the grove. The path starts in he grove and curves around to a small wooded area with bushes and all diffident kinds of trees. Half way to the creek I look at Chris and she looks a little tiered. "Hey kid you want a piggyback ride." she smiles and jumps up on a large rock. I turn my back to her and she jumps on. I start walking, taking extra big steps and bouncing around to make the ride more fun. The last stretch of the trail goes down hill to the creek. I pick up speed and run to the creek as fast as I can. I slid to a stop loose balance and we both fall to the ground. Chris and I just lay there for a moment laughing uncontrollably. After a moment the laughter dies down and if look at Chris. "you OK?"

"Yeah, I'm fine" she says sitting up and dusting herself off. "Come here" she says pulling me to the creek. "Lets skip rocks"

"I don't know how. I've never done it"

"That's OK I'll show you." we stand by the creek and she shows me how to pick out the best rock for skipping. After finding one that is flat round and smooth she starts to show me the right wrist movement for launching the rock. We spend most of the morning playing on the bank of the creek. At one point I fall in the water after Chris convinces me to hop across the stones to the other side. Once I have a chance to dry we start the walk back to the house. We start skipping and pouncing trying to stir up as much dust as we can. Eventually it turns into a race. I make sure to keep pace with her and at the end let her win. We climb the steps to the porch our shoes are covered in mud so we leave them out side. In side I see Tara on the couch in the living room looking through one of the front widows. I sneak up from behind and scare her. She jumps and slaps me in the arm as she turns around.

"Don't do that" she says with an irritated tone. Chris and me start laughing. Then Tara lets out a chuckle and asks. "Did Chris get you to try and cross the Creek?"

"Yeah. Hey what were you looking at anyway?" I ask.

"Joey, he's out side right now." I look out the window and see a tall fit guy with shaggy dirty blonde hair talking to Jennifer.

"Well Tara you were right that's one good lookin boy."

"I know right. You should see him ride a horse."

"Easy there you don't want your mom to here you talk like that."

"Oh what ever." just then Jennifer looks up at us in the window and we all turn away as fast as we can.

"You guy got caught!" Chris screams as she leaves the room.

"Hey Sam come out here for a sec!" I hear Jennifer call me from the front yard. I don't want to go out there now after being caught watching them.

"Hurry up get out there." Tara says pushing me.

"What no it'll be all awkward."

"I think it'll end up being more awkward if you don't go out there."

"Fine" I walk out the door and make my way down the steps of the porch. I realize at the bottom that I am not wearing shoes.

"Nice socks" I hear a guy say. I look up and make eye contact with Joey then look back down at my feet I'm wearing rainbow colored toe socks that Carly Gave to me. I didn't spend a lot of time packing when I left.

"Sam this is Joey. Joey this is Sam. We where just talkin and since Tara isn't goin to be able to ride for a wile, I thought Joey here could teach you to ride." Jennifer says.

"What like you mean like a horse."

"Yeah it'd be great. I'm real good I promise." Joey says. I guess learning to ride a horse wouldn't be too bad. I've kind of always wanted to learn.

"Yeah that could be fun."

"Good. Ok well start tomorrow then."

"Sounds good."

"Ok well I got to go so I'll see ya."

"Bye" me and Jenifer say at the same time.

Jennifer looks at me and says, "you know he really isn't bad lookin."

"No he is not," I say with a grin.

"Wait till you see him ride a horse." Jennifer says as she starts to walk to the house. What is it with these Newman girls?

* * *

><p><strong>So how did you like it? I love that Sam spent all morning with Chris and that Chris was able to make her fall in the creek. What did you think of Sam's dream? What do you think it meant? And i know it seems that Freddie is wasting his time, going in the wrong direction and all, but if you look at it from Carly, Melanie and Freddie's perspectives this is the best thing they could be doing to find Sam. I'd love to here your thoughts. So Please Review.<strong>


	9. The Past Goes Behind You

**Sam's POV**

Today is the day of my first horse-riding lesson. I'm a little nevus to be honest. I usually don't do thing that are out of my comfort zone, mostly because there isn't much that is out of my comfort zone. But for some reason this is getting to me.

The day started a little weird and by that I mean I didn't have a screaming six year old attacking me. Instead I woke up on my own. I sat in bed for a little while just thinking. I thought of the chores I had to do today and how I should check in on Leah one of these days. I thought of my old life in Seattle and how where I am now is the furthest thing from that. Finally I thought about Freddie and it was like something clicked in my head. Why was I obsessing over a nub. So he doesn't like me. Since when does Sam Puckett care what Freddie Benson thinks? Besides this is a new life that doesn't involve him. And today is just the thing I need to jump-start my new life, a lesson from my hot new ridding coach.

All of a sudden I realized how quite the house is. I get out of bed and start wondering down stairs. It wasn't till I reached the last step that I heard some noise coming from the kitchen. I walk into the kitchen to see Jeff standing in front of the stove. "Howdy " he says waving to me with a spatula.

"Hey, where is everybody? I ask as I sit at the table.

"Well Tara was makin such a big fuss over not bein able to walk. Jenny decided that they should go see the Doc and see if she can't get that brace off early. "He said as he placed two very large plates of food on the table.

"Well if no one else is here then why did you make so much food." he chuckled a bit before responding.

"Sam I may not have known you long, but I know you're the only one I ever met that can out eat me." he said as he took a bite of his egg in a hole. I laugh and start on my breakfast. We both eat in silence for a while before Jeff starts talking again. "So you start ridin today"

"Yeah, Joey's suppose to come over latter and give me my first lesson."

"Yeah, Joey's a good kid. But just watch out for his sister."

"He has a sister?" Jeff nods in response. "What's wrong with her?"

"Well she can be a hand full. Jenny doesn't much care for her."

"Why?"

"She has her reasons."

"And you, what do you think of her?"

"I don't know. She's cute so she can't be all bad." i give him a weird look as if to say are you kidding me. "What?"

"Nothing" I say as I laugh to myself and take another bite of my food. "So are you going to be there for my first lesson?" I ask slightly nervously, I don't know why I would be nervous though.

"I'd like to but someone needs to get some work done around this place."

"Oh . . . ok, I should go get ready" I say getting up from the table leaving half a plate of food. I don't feel very hungry all of a sudden. I leave the kitchen and make my way back up to my room. I grab a pair of wranglers and a red plaid shirt from the top drawer of the dresser. I shower and get dressed. I grab my brush off the dresser and accidentally knock my bag to the floor. My bag slams to the floor and my cell phone falls out of the side pocket. My cell died after the first day I left Seattle. I decide to get out my charger and plug in my phone. It powers on and I see the picture of me, Carly and Freddie that I set as my wallpaper. As hurt as I feel by the whole Carly and Freddie situation, they really didn't do anything at least they don't know they did. It's not there fault. I sill can't handle seeing them together but they deserve to at least know I'm alive. I start to scroll through my contacts. It doesn't take me long to come across Carly's name. I can't talk to her if I call she'll ask me a bunch of questions that I can't answer. I don't want her to know were I am because then she'll come and find me. And I can't tell her why I left. Maybe I could just send a text. I type out a message and press send. The phone says message sent. I unplug the phone and the battery light blinks before the phone shuts off. A knock on my door shocks me out of my thoughts. "Y . . . Yeah?" I call out to the person who knocked. Jeff's voice calls through the door.

"Joey's here, he's waiting down in the barn."

"Ok, I'll be right there." I call back as I stuff my phone back into my bag. I slip on a pair of Jennifer's boots that she lent me and head out side. On my way to the barn I see a brown haired girl a little taller than me getting out of a jeep. She sees me and walks over.

"Hey, you must be Sam." she says with a slight smirk on her face.

"Yeah, um are you Joey's sister?"

"Yeah, my name's Alexa." she says offering me her hand to shake. "So this will be your first time on a horse?"

"Yeah, never even been close to a horse till I came here."

"Where are you from again? Joey didn't really know." luckily I don't have to answer that because Joey interrupts our conversation. As much as I don't want the people from my old life knowing where I am, I don't want the people here to know where I came from.

"Hey Sam. I got River tacked up and ready to go for ya." Joey says sticking his head out from the barn.

"Oh thanks," I say as I walk past Alexa, ignoring her question. I hear her fallow behind as I walk into the barn. In the middle of the barn I see River and a horse I don't recognized tacked up and ready to ride. "Is this bear?" I ask walking up to the light brown horse. He is just as tall as Mary Ann. he lowers his head to me and pushes his snout toward my face. He has a single white dot between his eyes. I look right into his big brown eyes. There is something comforting about them something almost familiar.

"Yeah, lets get them out to the pin and we'll start." Joey says leading Bear out the barn. I follow Leading River. We go out to the far side of the barn away from the house. Joey opens the pin door and walks Bear in. He ties Bear to a post, turns and starts giving me pointers on how to ride. Alexa closes the door behind me and sits on the top of the fence. Joey hands me a helmet. "Ok now mount the horse." I strap the helmet on, take a deep breath and place my right foot in the stirrup. Placing my hands on ether end of the saddle, I jump to mount River when my foot slips from the stirrup and I fall flat on my back. Dust flies in the air from the impact. Joey rushes to me. "Sam are you ok?"

"Yeah, just peachy." I say sitting up with help from Joey. "I don't know if I can do this."

"What? What do you mean, it was just your first try." Joey says.

"Yeah, and I couldn't even get on the horse." I hear a small snicker from behind me. I glance back to see Alexa trying not to laugh. My eyes narrow and I can feel anger building inside me.

"Come on lets just try again. I'll help you up this time." Joey says, offering me his hand. I take his hand, pull myself up and dust off my clothes. Joey pulls river in front of me. The anger from before fades and is replaced by anxiety. Joey stands behind me ready to help me up. I place my right foot in the stirrup again and look back at Joey. Behind Joey something catches my eye. I see Jeff walk up to the fence, placing one foot on the bottom rung of the fence and leaning over the top. He gives me a smile and a slight nod. Suddenly I feel calm yet energized. I look back to Joey.

"OK lets do this," I say full of confidence. I start to turn to River before looking back at Joey, "just watch your hands," I say with a smirk. In one swift motion I land on the saddle.

"OK now ease her forward," Joey coached. I signal River forward and she responds. We start to make our way around the pin. "Keep your heals down." Joey coaches as he mounts Bear. "Feel the way she moves. Find your rhythm and work together." I start to feel the way she moves, muscle tightening and relaxing as she moves from one step to the other. I feel confident after a few times around the pin. I move River into a trot and find the rhythm almost immediately. "Your doin great Sam." Joey calls out from the center of the pin. I feel River wanting to go faster so I move up to a Canter. "Easy Sam don't get ahead of your self." I hear Joey's warning. But I know this is what River wants and I know she'll take care of me. River picks up speed and we make several laps around the pin before I look over to Jeff and see that he is not alone, Jennifer, Tara and Chris are all there. Tara standing with her crutches and Chris being held by her father. I slow River down to a stop in front of them.

"Hey when did you guys get back?" I ask.

"Just in time to see you tearin up the coarse." Jennifer says as she climbs the fence. "Are you sure this is your first time ridin?"

"Yeah, first time." I say with a smile on my face.

"Well you're a natural." Jeff says. "Way to go. You were amazing." Joey rides up.

"I've never seen anyone take to ridin so fast." Joey says. "Come on lets get these horses back to their stables."

"I'll go inside and get us all some lunch." Jennifer says. Joey and me ride River and Bear to the barn and dismount. We lead them into the barn and start to undo the saddle straps. About half way through Joey looks at me.

"Sam" Joey says.

"Yeah" I respond

"I was wonderin if you didn't have any plans this Saturday maybe we could do something?" did he just ask me out? What do I say? Should I go out with him? Suddenly images of Freddie popped into my head. I still have feelings for the nub. But this is my new life. He's not here. I need not to think of him. "Sam? . . you ok?"

"Oh sorry." I say realizing I still haven't given him an answer.

"So, what do ya say."

"Yes." I answer. "That sounds fun."

"Lunch!" Jennifer screams.

"Lets put these horses away and get some food I'm starving." I say as I walk past Joey.

* * *

><p><strong>This chapter was really hard to right, for some reason. but in the end i like the way it turned out.<strong>

**So what do you think Sam's Text says? What do you think of Joey? What about his sister? let me know. Please reveiw.**

**P.S. I love the whole Sam and Jeff relationship thing that was built. I didn't plan it, but i'm glad it happened.**


	10. One Message Changes It All

**Freddie's POV**

Yesterday was a long day. I lie in bed, my shoes kicked off, let out a long sigh and close my eyes. I didn't get hardly any rest last night. All I want is to fall asleep. I clear my head as best I can and try to relax. But before I can even start I hear a knock at my door. My eyes shoot open. I sit up and let out another sigh this time out of frustration. All I want is to be alone and process the events of the day before. I trudge my way to the door not even bothering to guess who it is on the other side. I open the door and see Melanie standing in front of me. "Hey what's up." I ask slightly shocked to see her standing alone in front of my hotel room.

"Hey, Carly left to go get us some breakfast and I just really don't want to be alone right now. Can I come in?" she says in a low voice.

"Yeah, come on in." I say stepping out of the way so she can pass. She walks into the room, makes her way to the bed and sits down. "So," I say as I close the door. "How you holdin up."

"I'm OK I guess. Just wish we were closer to finding Sam."

"Yeah." I walk over and sit on other side of the bed.

"Freddie," she says as she turns to me. "I just wanted to say thank you, for everything. For trying to find Sam and all this stuff with my father you've been really great." I start to feel uncomfortable. I don't fell like I've done anything. She said it her self we're not any closer to finding Sam.

"It doesn't matter Sam's still out there and we're not any closer to finding her."

"It does matter, it matters to Me." she says as she scoots closer and places her hand on mine. There it is again she keeps getting all close to me and touching me. This is just to weird. "You've been the one leading us through this search. You've been there for Carly and even me when I needed you. That really means a lot." she leans in closer and wraps my arm in a hug, placing her head on my shoulder.

Ok that's to close. I quickly stand up and slide my arm free. "No, no, no, this can't happen." I start sputtering.

"What?" she asks shocked by my outburst.

"This," I gesture between the two of us. "This can't happen. Sorry you're a good friend and fun and cool. But it just wouldn't work. And its not like its you at all it's just I . . . me . . . I'm just . . . and its not that you're not pretty cause your not. I mean your not unpretty or . . . no that didn't sound right." suddenly Melanie starts laughing, causing me to become even more confused. "Why are you laughing."

"You," she barely squeaks out between laughter. After a moment she calms down enough to explain more. "I'm sorry, I don't mean to laugh. It's just when you started freaking out and rambling I couldn't help my self."

"So you don't like me then?"

"No not at all." she scoffs.

"Well you don't have to say it like that." I say a little offended by her tone. Like the thought is that unbelievable.

"No I didn't mean it like that. It's just . . ." she pauses for a moment. It looks like she's deciding to tell me something. "Ok do you remember my roommate Stacey from when you came to see me at school?"

"Yeah"

"Well she and I have been dating for a while now." I think something in my brain just snapped. Did she just say . . . OK she defiantly just said that.

"Oh," was all I could think to say.

"Freddie are you ok?"

"Yeah, I just . . . so when did you . . . realize you were . . ." I couldn't find the words to finish my sentence.

"Gay?" she finishes for me.

"Yeah" I say as I sit back down next to her on the bed.

"Well I guess it was right after my last visit to Seattle."

"So you mean just after we kissed." she nods in response. I stop and think for a moment before coming up with a question I have to ask. "Am I really that bad of a kisser?" she almost immediately bursts into laughter fallowed soon by me. In our laughter I feel like a small weight has been lifted. Melanie doesn't like me like that and that's one less thing I have to worry about. Maybe the universe is going to give me a break. Suddenly pounding at my door interrupts our laughter. I get up and rush over to the door. I open the door and see Carly sanding in the hall out of breath.

"Sam texted me," she says.

"What, when?" I ask.

"Just a minute ago. I ran here right after I got the message." she says as she walks past me into the room.

"Well what did it say." she turns to me a distressed look on her face.

"Here," she hands me her phone, "read it."

I take the phone and look at the message. I read it out loud, 'I know you are wondering where I am and if I'm ok. But don't I'm fine, I just think its best if we all go our separate ways. I'm not coming back. Goodbye and have a good life.' that's it, that's all she wrote.

"So now what do we do?" Melanie asks.

I see both the girls looking at me for an answer. I turn away from them and start to grab my things. "We go home." I say in a flat expressionless tone.

"Wait so you're just giving up." Carly says shocked.

"Yeah, I guess so."

"So after all this you're just not looking for her anymore." Melanie chimes in.

I turn around letting my temper flair. "You hear what she said. She doesn't want us to find her. She doesn't want us in her life." I turn and knock the lamp off the desk, causing it to break and cut my hand. But I'm so worked up I don't even feel it. This whole time I should have seen it. Of course she doesn't want us. If she did she wouldn't of left or she would have at least told us where she was. The realization set in and it stung worst than anything, she doesn't want me.

"Freddie you can't just give up." Carly says.

"I'm not," I say without turning to look at her. "She's the one who gave up. She gave up on us. I'm just accepting her decision."

"But, Freddie . . ." she starts before I interrupt her.

"No . . . that's it. I have orientation in a few weeks and then I'm off to college. I have to get ready to leave."

"So that's it we're just done? We're not looking for her any more?" Melanie asks.

"Yeah." I say, my voice returning to the flat expressionless tone from before, as I grab my keys off the desk and walk out the door.

* * *

><p>Freddie reached his Breaking point. He feels rejected :(<p>

short chapter but very important. I'm trying to update faster. I want to post another chapter by Tuesday, (fingers crossed) so we'll see how it goes.

As always let me now what you think. Review Review Review


	11. Moving On

**Sam's POV**

Today starts just like any other day. Chris charges in my room and tries to drag me out of bed. I eventually give in and follow her down stairs. By the time we reach the kitchen breakfast is ready. We sit in our same spots, Jennifer goes over what is happening today and Jeff makes some stupid comment that causes Jennifer to get mad at him. I look around the table while Jennifer and Jeff go back and forth. I see Tara and Chris laughing at their parents and eating their food. Well Tara is eating her food and Chris is feeding Charlie under the table. We are all just sitting around the table and despite Jennifer and Jeff's little spat everyone seems really happy. I feel a smile spread across my face. I like it here.

"So Sam," Tara says breaking me from my happy thought. "Today is your date with Joey right."

"Hold on a sec you have a date with Joey?" Jeff asks. "Why didn't I know about this? Why am I always the last to know these things?"

"Why do you need to know?" Jennifer asks him.

"Well I just think its something I should have known," he says.

"Anyway," I say jumping in before anyone else has a chance to take us off topic any further. "Yes, I'm spending the day with Joey, but I wouldn't call it a date. We're just going to hang out."

"Sounds like a date to me." Chris says. Everyone looks at her immediately.

"What do you know about dating?" Tara asks her.

"I happen to have a boyfriend and his name is Brandon." Chris states proudly.

"OK well that's my cue." Jeff says as he stands up from the table. "If anyone needs me I'll be out workin on my tractor." he turns and leaves the kitchen. I laugh at Jeff's reaction to his daughter's clam.

"Come on sweetie I think we should have a talk." Jennifer says leading Chris out of the room. After breakfast Tara insists on getting me ready for my not date with Joey. I tried to protest but arguing with any one in this house is like arguing with, well me. They just don't drop a subject until they win. Honestly I don't mind letting them win from time to time.

Before I know it Joey is at the front door and I start to feel nervous. As much as I try to fight it this does seem to be a date. I answer the door and see Joey wearing a light blue collared shirt, holding a signal yellow rose. "Hey," he says with a smile. "This is for you." he hands me the rose.

"Thanks," I say. OK he defiantly thinks this is a date. Just stay calm maybe this will be good. What am I saying? Here I have a hot guy staring me in the eyes, giving me a flower, and just wants to take me on a date, of course this is good this is very good. He leads me down the porch steps and I see Bear and River tacked up. "What are they doin out?"

"Well I thought since you've been doin so well all week in your lessons, maybe we could take them out on a trail." he says as he hands me the helmet that was hanging from Rivers saddle.

"OK lets do It." he mounts up on Bear and I mount river. We start riding and follow the trees in the direction of the creek. For some reason I'm not getting into the idea of this being a real date. it feels like its missing something. Almost like it's all too simple. We follow the trail that me and Chris took to get to the creek, but before we get to the big hill that leads down to the bank we stop at a fork in the train. I look at Joey. "Where are we going?" I ask.

Joey looks back at me. "What you don't trust me?" he says with a smirk on his face. I don't answer. Joey just continues smiling and pushes Bear on. I decide to follow behind. The trail continues on running beside the creek. Soon the trail opens up and the creek feeds into a little pond.

"Wow," I say. The scene is beautiful. The trees are open above the pond letting sunlight in and sparkle off the water. Along the fare side of the creek are roses of all colors, brighter than I've ever seen. The trees hang over just far enough to give shade along the shore of the pond. My eyes stopped on a picnic basket and blanket next to the pond. "What's that?"

"That is our lunch. I came by before and set it up. That's where I got your flower from." Joey says pointing across the pond, seeming very proud of himself. He leads me over to the tree line where we tie up the horses. We walk side by side to the picnic. "So what do you think?"

"This all looks great," I say as I sit on the blanket. "So what did you bring to eat?" Joey starts laughing and reaches in the basket.

"Jennifer told me that you had a healthy appetite."

"You asked Jennifer about me?"

"Well yeah, I mean I didn't know a whole lot about you so I asked. Didn't do much good, turns out Jennifer doesn't know much ether, about your past anyway. Seems your kind of a mystery," he says handing me a large sandwich and a bottle of apple juice.

"Why wouldn't you just ask me?"

"Would you have told me?"

"No," I answer flatly. "But what about you, what's your story?"

"My story." he restates. "My story's kind of boring. I was born right here. I was raised here. My parents own a few ranches so I don't have to work to hard except when the Newman's need help with the harvest. But its good I get to do what I really love." I look at him questioningly. "Being a riding coach. I competed a little when I was younger, in shows and I even raced a little. I was pretty good but I'm an even better coach, and the rest of my life has been built around that."

"Wow," I say through a mouth full of food causing Joey to let out a slight chuckle.

"So now that I told you all that do you want to tell me something about you." he asks a slight hint of hope in his eyes.

"No I'm good."

"Really."

"Look, where I've been isn't as important as where I am. There's noting in my past that you need to know. And if you want to get to know me then we can just start from here and move forward."

"Fair enough," he says putting his hands up in defeat. We spend the rest of the day together by the pond talking, laughing and we even went for a short walk to the rose side to look at the flowers. We ride back to the house and set the horses in their stables. He walks me up the porch steps and to the door. "So did you have a good time?"

"Yeah, I did."

"So do you think we should do it again some time?"

"I don't know, this was fun but . . ." I couldn't finish because Joey started talking over the top of me.

"Come on we had fun. We don't have to make it anything serious. Lets just hand out. We don't even have to call it dating, we don't have to call it anything."

"OK, but we're not dating." he gives me a nod and a little smile. He leans in and places a small innocent kiss on my cheek.

"Goodnight Sam," he says before turning and walking away. I walk inside. As soon as I turn around from closing the door I see Jennifer, Tara and Chris standing in front of me. Then all at once they started asking me questions. "How'd it go? Where did he take you? Was it romantic? Are you going to see him again? Did you two kiss? Did you do more than kiss?"

"OK ladies, ladies!" Jeff bellows coming in from the kitchen, "that's enough lets leave Sam be I'm sure she doesn't want to be interrogated right now. OK, Chris it's your bed time and Tara you got to get up early to go to the doc's because I know you want that brace off. Jenny you should give her a hand up the stairs." and with that all the girls make there way up the stairs. As soon as they were all gone I turned to Jeff to thank him when I see this big goofy look on his face.

"What?" I ask giving him an odd look.

"So how'd it go?" he asked with a big stupid smile spreading across his face. I let out a long sigh and turn to walk up the stairs.

As I start up the stairs I call back, "Goodnight Jeff," and make my way to my room hearing him grumble something to himself the whole way.

* * *

><p>I know i said Tuesday so sue me. No, on second thought don't. I really don't to be sued.<p>

Anyway there you go. As before i love to know what you think so tell me.

P.S. Please, please don't sue me.


	12. The Breaking Point

**Freddie's POV**

I wake up and look to my right. I see my roommate laying the wrong way across his bed. He didn't get in till the early morning and doesn't look like he's getting up any time soon. I sit up and run my hands through my hair. Today is the first day of classes for me. I moved into my Dorm room three days ago. My roommate Chad was already here when I arrived. We get along OK. He's a pretty good guy. He really likes to party though and has no intention of pacing himself. For the past few weeks I've been trying everything I can to not think of Sam. I even went out with Chad two nights ago. Carly and Melanie Continued to search for Sam. Carly wanted to keep me in the loop despite my protests so I stopped talking to her. The thing is I don't want to push her away, but I just can't always be reminded of Sam, it hurts too much. Not that I need to be reminded of Sam though. It's crazy, you don't know how much someone is integrated into your life until you try and forget them. It doesn't matter where I am or what I'm doing I can't go more than ten minutes at a time before she pops back into my head. And it's the dumbest things that remind me of her, when I try to listen to music her voice rings through my head about how nubby my choice in music is, or when I pull out my wallet to pay for something I see the small tear in the leather from the last time she tried to snatch it from me, and every time my phone rings my heart stops for a moment because even though I know it's not going to be her I can't help but hope I'm wrong. It drives me crazy how much I want to forget her while at the same time never letting go. It makes no sense how I can feel two completely opposite things at the same time.

Once again I look to my right, only this time I see Chad sitting up strait staring at me, fully dressed for the day. "How? . . . Weren't you just passed out?" I ask not knowing how he can get ready so fast.

"Yeah," he answers like it was a stupid question. "Come on were going to be late for psych." I roll out of bed and put on a clean shirt. Chad and I head off to class. I always thought on my first day of college I would be nervous. I've been working for this since grade school and it all happened according to plan. But for some reason it just feels like a hollow victory. "Dude are you ok?" Chad asks breaking me from my thoughts.

"Yeah, why?" I answer quickly.

"Well it's just you were kind of spacin out there for a little."

"Oh, yeah I guess it's just first day jitters" I lie. We get to the lecture hall where our class is held. We start to walk up the stairs and find a seat. Chad is talking to me about something but I'm just not listening. I walk past a girl; our eyes connect for a fraction of a second. I continue to walk up two more steps and get ready to claim a seat when Chad turns me around to face him.

"Dude that girl was totally checkin you out"

"Who? Her?" I ask, pointing to the girl I passed before.

"Yeah, you should go ask her out." before I have a chance to respond one of Chad's 'party friends', or at least that's what he calls them, comes over and diverts his attention. What is he thinking, me go ask her out I mean a girl like that wouldn't be into me. Out of nowhere Sam's voice starts running through my head, "good choice, cause no girl would want to go out with you. You're just saving her the trouble of turning you down."

"Wait, there's girls that like me. Girls would send in comments to iCarly all the time about me." I argue back to the fake Sam in my head.

"Yeah, but those girls where all freaks and mutants. No normal girl would ever go out with you. Face it your just a nubby little computer geek and your going to be alone forever." the words cut me deep. Part of me knows that it's not really Sam saying these things but it doesn't matter. I still feel the same rejection that I never wanted to face. Suddenly I feel like I have to stand up for my self and fight back against the fake Sam, like I've always done to the real Sam. As if to prove a point I stand up and walk over to the pretty girl that has had her eye on me almost the whole time I've been in the class. I realize right when I get to her that I didn't think of anything to say and if I just start talking in my current mood I would probably come off angry. So I just stand there looking like an idiot until she talks.

"Hey . . . are you ok?" she asks looking at me with a little concern.

"Yeah," I say, more trying to clear my throat than answer her. "Hey, my name is Freddie." I say offering her my hand to shake.

" My name's Ricky. I recognize you from the Internet. iCarly right?"

"Yeah, you watched?"

"Yeah, I was sad when you guys stopped."

"All good things must come to an end I guess." I shake my head trying to keep myself from thinking of the how much fun doing iCarly over the years had been and how it all ended. "I actually came over here . . . well I was wondering if your not doing anything this weekend maybe we could go out and get something to eat or . . . see a movie or something."

"Actually I already have plans with my friends this weekend," she says motioning to the girls behind her, "but I'm free tonight."

"Tonight ah . . . yeah tonight would be good.

"Ok so how about we meet in front of Steinberq Hall next to the bike racks. Say around seven thirty."

"OK see ya then," I turn and make my way back to my seat. Next to my seat I see a very shocked looking Chad staring at me. "What?" I ask.

"Did you really just go over there and talk to her?" he asks.

"Yeah, so?"

"Well I just thought you . . . kind of . . . had a fear of talking to girls. The other day when we went out to that party you barely looked at any girl twice."

"Yeah well I guess things are different now."

"OK so what'd she say?"

"We have a date tonight," I state proudly.

"What we do?" Chad says, motioning between the two of us.

"Not me and you, me and her." I say shocked at how he got so confused. After I explained to him what was going on he congratulated me and wouldn't let it go throughout the whole class. After class I return to my room and laid out my clothes for my date. I know how nubby it is for a guy to pick out his clothes so early but all I could think about was my mom's stupid rhymes and songs about being on time and clean and prepared. So finally I just gave in to it. After lunch and a long study session with Chad and some of his friends, I got ready for my date and Chad left with his friends to a party. Chad says that there is always a party somewhere and it's just a matter of finding it.

I walk up to the bike racks we agreed to meet at and I see her standing under a street light, that was turned on a little early because the sun is not even set. I walk up from behind and tap her on the solder causing her to turn around. "Hey," she says a smile breaking across her face. I return the smile and say hi back. "So where are we going?"

"Well there's a really sappy romantic comedy starting in about twenty minutes that I really don't want to see, or we could take a walk to this little ice cream shop that I found a few days ago." I say, trying my best to sound charming.

"Ice cream sounds great." she says with a slight chuckle.

We walk down the street side by side. She talks about where she's from and her family. I talk about Seattle and how I'm not missing the rain. We arrive at the ice cream shop and look at all the flavors. I settle on a strawberry shortcake waffle cone and she orders half chocolate and half coconut. We sit in the shop eating our ice cream and talking for hours. We talked about nothing really just messing around and making jokes. Eventually one of the workers came up to us and said we had to leave because they were closing up for the night. We start walking back in the direction we came from. Tonight has been really fun. The whole night has taken my mind of everything. I've just been having fun. I decide to be bold and I grab he hand as we walk. She looks down at our fingers interlaced then back up to me. She gives me a smile and pulls me over to a bench next to some trees. We sit there for I don't know how long, not saying a word, but it wasn't awkward. I stair in to her big blue eyes and I find myself leaning in until I feel our lips meet. The kiss just keeps going and going. The longer the kiss lasts the more passionate it becomes. The next thing I know she's sitting across my lap. She is rubbing her hands across my chest and back up through my hair. My hands are exploring her from her thighs to her hips and eventually pulling her head to one side trying everything I can to just get closer to her. She moans into the kiss and I moan back. We break for a moment and I breath her name, "Sam."

"WHAT!" she exclaims, breaking me out of my trance and making me realize what I've just done. "Did you just call me Sam!"

"No . . . well yes but I didn't mean it I was just . . ." I don't bother finishing because she's already waking away. What is wrong with me, I have a beautiful girl sitting on my lap, kissing me on my face and all I think about is Sam. What am I doing here? I don't know what to do with myself. I need to get out of here. I need to go somewhere I can clear my head and just think. I stand up from the bench and sprint as fast as I can to my car. I get in and just start driving leaving school behind me. Not bothering to grab my things. I just need some place that can keep my mind off of everything.

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><p>i'd just like to say thank you to all of you who have favorited, followed and reviewed this story. those who have reviewed go a head and review again if you want and if you haven't reviewed give it a try you might like it. more than anything i just want to know what you think, so let me know.<p> 


	13. Look Who's Staying

**Freddie's POV**

I've been driving for about twenty-four hours now, which means that I've been awake for somewhere around thirty-eight hours. I haven't even stopped to get anything to eat, only for gas a few times. I need to get to where I'm going. The faster I get there the better. The lines on the road look like there faded. My eyes feel very heavy and the road fades more. Suddenly my head shoots up from the steering wheel and I swerve just before hitting a tree. My tiers screech to a stop. Luckily I'm the only car on the road. I rub my eyes and decide that I should call it a night. I look around and see a bright glowing sign in the distance. I take a deep breath and drive to it. The light is for a truck stop gas station. Next to the gas station is a small diner. I park in the first space next to the door of the diner. All the lights are off inside. I start to feel really tiered again and decide to just lean my chair back and fall asleep.

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><p>I wake up to the sound of taping on glass. My eyes open and I see a large bald man standing next to my car. I look at the time on my phone it says 6:21. I roll down my window and ask the man, "what?"<p>

"Are you OK?" the man asks, seeming more like he wants to know why I am hear.

"Yeah I just . . . I fell asleep and almost drove off the road, so I pulled in here and decided to sleep." I say as I wipe the sleep from my eyes.

"If your well rested I'll be opening the diner soon and you can come get something to eat if you like."

"That sounds good thanks." the man makes his way to the diner and starts fumbling with his keys to open the door. I wait for a little wile after he enters the building before I decide to follow him. I enter the diner; only half of the lights are on in the place. There is a long row of seats that run along a counter and booths along all the outside windows. I see some movement in the back and the man pops out form the doorway to the kitchen.

"Hey, just go ahead and sit anywhere," he says motioning to all the open seats. I nod my head and make my way to the counter and take a seat. The man walks over and sets a cup down in front of me. "Want some coffee?" the man asks swirling a large pot of black coffee in front of me.

"Please." I say with a little rasp in my voice.

"My names Greg by the way."

"I'm Freddie." I say offering him my hand to shake. He grabs my hand and gives it a nice hard shake.

"Can I get you anything else Freddie?"

All of a sudden I realize how hungry I am. "Some eggs would be nice, and do you have any pie?"

"We have apple and cherry pies."

"OK I'll take some scrambled eggs and a slice of apple pie."

"Comin right up." Greg disappears into the back, leaving me alone with a cup of coffee and my thoughts. I start thinking of what happened the other night with Ricky. I was an idiot and a jerk. She didn't deserve that and I hate how I was that guy. But it made me realize I can't pretend everything's OK. I need to get my head clear before I go back to school. I take a deep breath and take a sip of my Black coffee. Just then Greg walks out from the kitchen with two plates in his hands. "here you go," he says setting the plates down in front for me.

"Thanks." I start to dig in to the eggs.

"So where you headed? If you don't mind me asking." Greg says as he starts setting up the rest of the diner.

"Well to be honest I'm more trying to leave something behind." I say.

"Yeah, and how's that going"

"It's proving to be the hardest thing I've ever had to do."

Greg scoffs and let's out a slight chuckle before asking, "so what was her name?"

I look at him, not saying a thing, trying to decide how much I want to tell him. "Sam," I say in a weak voice.

"And so you think she . . ." I cut him off before he can continue.

"Can I get this pie to go." I say taking my last bite of egg. I just really don't want to be talking about this.

"Yeah sure," he says taking my pie. "Look I didn't mean to . . ." I cut him off again.

"No it's fine. I should just be getting back on the road." he hands me back my pie in a plastic container. "How much do I owe you?"

"It's on the house," he says waving me off.

"Thanks." I say sincerely. I turn and walk out of the diner and to my car. I leave the parking lot and continue heading west. I only have about seven hours left till I'm there.

* * *

><p><strong>Sam's POV<strong>

I'm crouched down in the doorway to the bathroom looking at my bed. I stuffed an extra blanket and pillow under the covers to make it look like I was still sleeping. Slowly my door starts to open and I try to make myself as invisible as possible. A small girl with solder-length brown hair comes sneaking in. once she's fully in the room she takes off running toward my bed. I chase after her and as she leaps into the air I put out my hands and snatch her before she hits the bed. I start spinning her around the room and she screams like crazy. I toss her onto the bed and she looks back at me with a scowl on her face. "You're supposed to be in bed." she says as she crosses her arms and begins to pout. I tackle her flat on the bed and start tickling her stomach. She screams, breaks away from me and runs out of the room. I chase after her and we run down the stairs together. She heads strait for the kitchen and I follow close behind. I enter the kitchen to the same scene I always come into, of everyone already in the kitchen sitting and eating breakfast. Chris is now sitting by her big sister giving me the stink eye from across the table. I join everyone at the table.

"So you girls ready for another day of work?" Jeff asks.

"Actually I was wondering if I could go see Leah and then catch up with you guys later in the grove?" I ask.

Jeff nods his head and says, "Yeah, OK. You've been working hard you deserve some time off. Why don't you take Bear and just meet up with us later." Jeff says as Jennifer scoops some scrambled eggs onto my plate. I've been riding Bear for a few weeks now, ever since Tara got the brace off her leg and started riding River again. I finish my breakfast and head back up stairs to get ready for the day. After a shower and a set of clothes I set out to the barn to get Bear ready. As I enter the barn I see Bear perk up and our eyes connect. After I tack up Bear we set out in the direction of Leah's B&B.

For the past few weeks we've started harvesting walnuts from the grove, it's a lot of work but working with everyone is actually really fun. Even Joey has come by and helped a few times. Joey and I have been hanging out more and more. I'm not saying we're getting serious but things are going good. And I think I'm starting to like him a little bit. I've even started to become OK friends with his sister. I try to visit Leah as much as I can. For some reason I just feel like I can talk to her about anything. I'm not sure what it is but living here feels different, like I'm different. I really care about everyone hear.

I arrive at Leah's and I see her out side watering her plants. I wave to her as I ride Bear around back to a small troff that I fill with water for him. I go around to the front where Leah is. "Hey Sam." Leah says giving me a hug.

"Hey how you doin?" I ask.

"Good, come on lets go in I'll make some tea." we go inside and make our way too the kitchen. Leah puts on a kettle and I take a seat at the table. Leah takes the seat next to me. "So Sam how's things at the Newman's going?"

"Good, the harvest is going to be over soon and the girls are getting ready to go back to school." I say.

"You've really taken a liking to those girls haven't you."

"Yeah, Chris is crazy and fun and Tara is equally as crazy but all about the boys and River. I really like them."

"Well what are you going to do when the harvest is over? Where are you gonna to go?"

"Honestly, I don't want to leave. I like it here, I like the people and I like my new life." I remember the words the old man said to me on the train the first day I left, 'Find a place you can call home. Hold on to it, fight for it.' suddenly I feel like it's not even a decision I have to make. Leah looks at me knowingly. "I'm going to ask Jennifer and Jeff if I can stay." I tell Leah.

"That's what I wanted to hear." Leah says as she gets up and gives me a hug. The hug lasts until the kettle on the stove starts whistling and Leah goes to prepare the tea. I spend the a little more time with Leah just talking. She brought up Joey a few times but I change the subject every time. Around noon I decide that I should get back to help, so Leah and I say our goodbyes and I set out on Bear back to the grove. I ride through the trees for about a quarter mile before I see everyone. Joey, Alexa and even Charlie are here too.

"There she is." Jeff calls out, followed by everyone greeting me. I dismount and tie Bear off to a tree.

"Jeff, Jennifer can I talk to you two for a sec?" I ask walking in there direction.

They walk toward me and Jennifer says, "sure honey what's up?"

"Well I was thinkin, you know stayin with you guys has been great and I know that the deal was to just stay through the harvest, but I was wondering if I could stay longer?" I ask hesitantly. Jeff and Jennifer look at one another for a moment then look back at me.

"OK," Jeff says.

"Wait, seriously just OK I can stay with you guys?

"Yeah the girls like ya, your a hard worker . . . most of the time and as long as you try not to eat us out of house and home, we'd love for you to stay with us." Jennifer says.

"Come on lets go tell everyone." Jeff says putting his arms around Jennifer and me. We walk over to the center of were everyone is. "Attention everyone we have an announcement. Sam has decided she's gonna stay with us." everyone starts to smile and cheer. Everyone closes in and we end up in a big group hug. Just as everyone starts to break off Jeff speaks up again. "You know what, we're done workin for today lets go celebrate." everyone starts to cheer again and jumps on to the large wagon half filled with walnuts, Jeff lifts Charlie into the wagon and starts to pull the wagon with his tractor. I follow behind on Bear. And we make our way to the house. I feel good now, happy. Like I'm where I should be. I look at everyone in the wagon and they all look happy too. This place is almost perfect. We reach the house. I dismount from Bear in the back of the house and start to walk to the front. I see the tractor and the wagon parked in front of the barn.

"Look," Tara yells pointing to the front of the house. Almost everyone except for Joey goes running to where Tara pointed. I get very curious to what they are so excited about. So I hurry around to the front of the house, leading Bear the whole way. I get to the front and see that it's a person that they are existed about but I can't see who it is through everyone.

Suddenly everyone starts to back away and I see him standing there. I look into his deep brown eyes and they meet mine. I'm frozen. I'm in sock. I barley am able to say his name but it still leaves my lips. "Freddie?"

"Sam?"

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><p>dun dun dun. . . why is Freddie there. Why was everyone so excited to see him. Big mystery i bet you want to know the answers. unfortunately you have to wait to find out.<p>

I know it took me longer than normal to update but this chapter was hard to write. Next chapter i'll try and be faster with.

As you may know i love Reviews so leave one and let me know what you think. thanks for reading.


	14. Old Friends

**Sam's POV**

I'm just standing here starring into his eyes. I feel my hands shaking. What is he doing here? Why does everyone know him? This isn't right. This is my new life. He can't be here. I left him behind. We both are just staring at each other. The longer I look at him the angrier I become. The image of him and Carly together flashes through my head over and over. My shaking hands clench into fists. All I want to do is go over there and beat him to the ground for ruining this for me like he did for everything in Seattle. But my feet won't move toward him. All of a sudden my feet start moving, but in the wrong direction. I find myself sprinting into the house and up the stairs.

**Freddie's POV**

Sam turns and Runs into the house. I still can't believe my eyes. Was that really Sam? Tara runs after her into the house. I look at my aunt Jennifer and she looks almost as confused as I am.

"You know Sam?" she asks.

"Yeah, I know Sam! How do you Know Sam?" I ask feeling like I might have a panic attack.

"She's the new farm hand I told you about a few weeks ago."

"She's the farm hand you were talking about. Why didn't you tell me it was Sam?"

"I didn't know you knew her. How do you know her?"

"She's Sam from iCarly. How could you not recognize her from iCarly?"

"OK to be completely honest I've never really watched iCarly." If I sill wasn't freaking out about just finding Sam I might be offended that my aunt, who has been like a second mom to me, has never watched iCarly.

"She's the Sam I've told you about a million times."

"She's that Sam? The one who beats you and humiliates all the time."

"Yes, that Sam."

"Well, why are you freaking out? So you know her what's the big deal."

"The big deal is that she left Seattle a few months ago and didn't tell anyone where she was going. Everyone has been freaking out and looking for her." Jennifer gives me a very thoughtful look, but I ignore it and start to move to the house, "I need to talk to Sam." I say still fired up with frustration, anger and confusion.

Just as I pass Jeff, who was standing between me and the house holding Bear's reins after Sam ran away, he grabs my arm and pulls me back to meet his eyes. "Freddie Why don't you help me put Bear back in his stable." as I look into his eyes I realize it wasn't a request. I give him a simple nod. He releases my arm and we make our way to the barn.

**Sam's POV**

I burst into my room. I don't even know why I ran here. That stupid nub had to go and ruin everything. I can't stand to face him. I can't even stand to look at him without freaking out. I glance around my room and my eyes fall on my bag. I through it on the bed. In one motion I pull the top dresser drawer out and dump it on the bed. I start stuffing clothes into my bag when Tara appears in the doorway.

"Sam what are you doing?" Tara says stepping into the room.

I look at her and stop packing my bag. "I . . . I have to go. I can't stay here anymore." I say turning back to my bag.

"How do you know Freddie?" she asks.

I stop packing again and let out a long sigh. "I'm from Seattle. Back there I knew Freddie. We were kind of friends."

"What happened?"

"It doesn't matter. I just . . . I can't be around Freddie anymore."

"So you're just going to leave. What about us. We don't want you to go."

"I can't."

"Why? Whatever it was that happened with you and Freddie doesn't matter. We care about you and want you to stay with us," her voice sounds like she's trying to hold back tears.

I look up to her again and see Chris just out side the door. She walks in, past her sister and goes strait to me. She raps her arms around my waist and gives me a hug. I put my hand around her back. " Please don't go Sam." I here her say in a muffled voice. I feel my eyes burning to hold back tears.

"OK fine I'll stay." I say in defeat. Tara joins our hug. I really never had a chance at leaving with these girls here. Our hug breaks up and I sit back on the bed. "But I still don't know what to do about Freddie."

"What happened between you guys?" Tara asks.

"OK I'll tell you but you two have to promise me you won't tell anyone. Deal?"

"Deal," they both say at the same time.

**Freddie's POV**

I close the door to Bears Stable. So far I haven't said a word to Jeff. I turn to him and speak, "So how long has she been here?"

"What do you mean, Jennifer has been here since we moved in.," he says trying to make a joke.

"Not Jennifer Sam, How long has Sam been here!"

"OK OK calm down. I was just trying to lighten the mood a little. She's been here for a little over two months." I can't believe Sam's been here the whole time.

"How did she end up here?"

"She was just passin through, she found Tara in the Grove hurt after River Through her and she walked her home. Been here ever since." it feels like a dream like all of this isn't real. I wouldn't be surprised if I woke up right now.

"Why did you stop me from going and talking to her?"

"I thought you should cool off before talking to anyone."

"Thanks."

**Sam's POV**

I just told Tara and Chris the whole story of what happened between me and Freddie and why I left Seattle. They look a little shocked but Tara finally finds a way to speak. "So you like Freddie then?"

"I did yeah." I answer.

"But you don't anymore?"

"Well . . . I don't know maybe."

"I think you should go talk to him." Tara says

" Yeah I think you should go talk to him." Chris says right after her sister.

"I can't talk to him I wouldn't even know what to say." I argue.

"What do you mean?" Tara asks.

"He's gonna ask why I left and all kinds of other questions that I can't answer."

"Well you have to think of something. You can't just not talk to him."

"Why not?"

"Because you're staying here. He came for a visit and now that he knows your here he may not want to leave right away."

"Fine I'll go talk to him." I get up from the bed, take a deep breath and walk out of the room. I walk down the stars and out the door. I see Joey loading his things into the back of his black F-150. He spots me and meets me half way to the barn.

"Hey are you OK?" Joey asks putting his hand on my solder.

"Yeah, I just got a little freaked out that's all. I'll be fine." I say.

"OK, well if you want to talk to someone let me know."

"Thanks." I give him a hug goodbye. He gets in his truck and leave.

Freddie's POV

I head for the Barn doors. Just before I go outside I look out the door and see Sam hugging Joey. I feel my heart sink in my chest. I feel myself starting to get worked up again, but Jeff's voice plays through my head reminding me to stay calm. Joey leaves and I step out of the barn. Sam sees me almost immediately. She looks nerves, like she doesn't want to be here standing in front of me. I make my way to her. Nether of us seem eager to start the conversation. Suddenly Sam breaks the silence with a question, "So how do you know everyone?"

"Jennifer's my aunt," I answer. The silence returns and we're just standing there staring awkwardly at each other. The question that I've wanted to ask finally spills out of my mouth. "What are you doing here?"

"What?"

"Here, what are you doing here? Why did you leave Seattle? What's going on with you?"

"It was something I had to do?"

"What the hell does that even mean?

"It was just . . .you and Carly where going off to college and I didn't know what I was going to do."

"What do you mean you didn't know what you where going to do?"

"I didn't know what I was going to do with my life. Didn't know what I was going to do when you guys were gone. When I was on my own. So I Left to find what I was going to become." that's it she was afraid of, the future. How could it be that simple, Sam's never simple? Why couldn't it have been something more . . . I don't know annoying. Something I could get mad about. I can't be mad at her for wanting to figure her life out.

I take a deep breath and look her right in the eyes. "You should have at least told us that you were leaving. You didn't even say good bye."

"I sent Carly a text." She says meekly.

"Yeah, like a month latter with some BS about how its better if we never see you again. You know we looked for you. Carly and Melanie are still looking for you. We were all really freaked out when you left."

"Sorry OK, i didn't mean to freak you guys out."

"Sam we care about you, what makes you think that if you left we wouldn't worry about you?"

"I don't know."

The air falls quiet between us. I'm trying to think of what to say next when a random thought pops into my head. "Were you ridding Bear?"

"Yeah, he's yours right?"

"Yeah," I look over to the barn then back at her. "How's he been?"

"He's been good," she says with a slight smile. "I've been taking care of him."

"I think I should call Carly. Tell her she can stop looking for you."

"Freddie I'm not going back to Seattle, I'm staying here."

"OK I get it."

"If Carly comes here she's going to try and get me to go back."

"I'll talk to her. It'll be OK."

"Thanks." she says as she turns and starts to walk to the house.

I call out to her, "hey! It's good to see you again Sam."

"You too," she says turning back with a small smile. "Nub."

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><p>Finally we get to some seddie this is what I've been waiting for.<p>

OK I just wanted to point out something I put into place before I even started this story. Freddie's aunt's name is Jennifer. If you watch the show there is a scene in the episode iMeet Fred where Freddie is having a argument over the phone where he says "Oh yeah well your a bigger one!" then angrily hangs up the phone. When the is asked who it was he was talking to he says "my aunt Jennifer." And so i wrote her and her crazy personality into my story. Then made her a crazy family to match.

You know what's fun? Reviewing. Don't believe me? give it a try.

Thanks for reading.


	15. Redo

**Sam's POV**

it's the second day since Freddie showed up. Things around the farm have been a little . . . rough. Everyone can feel the awkward tension in the air. It's not just from me. it seems like once everyone found out about me and Freddie knowing each other no one knew how to act around us. When Freddie's not around everything is like it always was. But when me and him are near each other, which doesn't happen often, people just sort of clam up and there's a lot of . . . quite. To be completely honest I've kind of been avoiding him when I can. When we work in the grove I chose the spot in the opposite direction of him. And when we're not working I'll play with Tara and Chris or run off to Leah's or even go somewhere with Joey. Part of me is really happy to see him again, but it just feels like there's a wall between us. There's a lot to say but nether of us seem to want to talk. Breakfast is weird because the only open seat at the table is right next to me and there's no way to avoid him. What I can't figure out is why is he here. I know that this is his family but I'm sure his college has started already and even if it hadn't why isn't he with Carly aren't they like dating now.

Whatever, I need to clear my mind. I think I'll go over to Leah's today. See if she can help me make since out of all this.

After Freddie Finished his breakfast he went to go get ready. I take my plate to the sink where Jennifer is. "Hey I was thinkin I would go drop in on Leah, see if she could use some help around the house." I say.

"Yeah that would be good. You can go with Freddie." Jennifer says.

"Yeah that sounds good." I hear Freddie say from behind me. Oh my God I'm trying to get away and figure out what to do from here. And he's just going to pop up and decide to go to the one person I feel I can go talk to about anything.

"Why are you going to Leah's?" I ask.

"She asked me to come by and see if I could fix her computer and she also has a fence that got knocked down by some wild horses." Freddie says while grabbing his coat off the back of one of the chairs and swinging it over his solders. I look at Jennifer and she gives me a look that says 'just go'. So I turn back to Freddie.

"Fine." I say a little colder than I intended.

"OK you go get Ready and I'll go tack up River and Bear."

"no, take Mary Ann. Tara's got a ridding lesson today and she's gonna need River." Jennifer says.

"OK Mary Ann it is." Freddie says and turns around and walks out the front door. I drag my feet as I walk up the stars and to my room.

**Freddie's POV**

I walk out to the barn. As I enter I am greeted by various neighs and snorts. I go up to bear that looks excited to see me. "Well at least someone is happy to see me." I say to Bear as I reach up and rub his snout. What's with Sam? I guess she's just upset that I found her and that she's been with my family with out even knowing it. I still don't know why she left in the first place. But all that doesn't even matter to me anymore. She's here and I'm here but there's no more us. She avoids me at all costs. Mainly I just want for things to get back to the way they were before. Even if it means daily beatings and endless verbal abuse, I'd rather have that and still have her in my life than her pushing me away. The idea that she is right in front of me but might as well be miles away is crushing. I thought that if I fond her . . . I don't know, I guess I thought that things would go back to normal. But that was more wishful thinking than anything else. But even Tara and Chris have been acting deferentially toward me, like I did something to them.

I take a long breath to clear my head and finish with the horses. I lead them out of the Barn just in time to see Sam coming down the porch. "Hey, you ready?" I ask but she just ignores me. She places her foot in the stirrup, hops up and mounts Mary Ann. I mount Bear and we set off to Leah's. The ride over is silent and to be honest a little awkward. We arrive at Leah's and take the horses' around back to the troff. We walk up to the door and I knock. Out of the corner of my eye I see Sam looking at me, so I glance over at her. She is looking strait before turning to me.

"What!" she asks.

"Nothing." I say quickly and look back to the door. Almost right after that Leah answers the door.

"Hey, your both here, good." Leah says pushing us out to the porch. She turns and closes the door behind her.

"What's up?" Sam asks.

"My nephew is here visiting."

"And?" I coaxed.

"And he always gives me a hard time about not having any costumers. He always tries to get me to move to California and stay with him. So here's what I need you to do, you two act like customers, just pretend your a couple that needs a place to stay for the night. And that way he will lay off."

"No" Sam says.

"Yeah I don't think this is a good idea." I add.

"Oh come on guys please. I've helped both you guys in the past."

"How are we supposed to be customers? We don't even have any luggage." Sam argues.

"Oh," Leah says as she turns around and pulls out two luggage bags from under the chair on the porch." Here, use these."

Sam looks shocked at the bags then back to Leah. "What . . . why do you . . . what about the horses. We can't just leave them out there."

"I'll call Jennifer she'll come and get them and I'll have her leave the car and ride back. So you can drive back in the morning."

I look at Sam knowing there is nothing that ether of us could say that would make Leah stop. As usual she has thought of everything and the only choice that we have is to go along with her. "OK, I'll do it." Sam says sulking like a little Kid.

"Thank you." Leah says taking a step back and looking at us. "Act more like a couple. Here." Leah takes our hands and puts them together so we're holding each other's hands. "OK let's go." She says opening the door and leading us inside. I glance over at Sam and she is looking at our hands interlocked. She doesn't look mad or even annoyed. I half expected her to crush my hand as soon as she had the chance, but she's just gently holding my hand. As we enter I see a man in his late twenties peak out form the kitchen. Leah leads us to the couch in the front room. " If you would just wait here I'll be right back in a moment to get you signed in." Leah leaves the room and I turn to Sam.

"I'm not comfortable with this," I say in a whisper.

"Me nether, But I owe Leah so we're dong It." she says matching my tone. She slides her hand out of mine and crosses her arms in front of her as we sit down. My hand feels cold and empty without her touch. I try to shake the feeling from my hand but lingers.

"Yeah me to."

"What do you owe her for?" before I had a chance to answer the man from the kitchen walks into the room. It's a good thing because I'm not sure if I really wanted to answer her question. I stand up and introduce us to the man.

"Hi I'm Freddie, this Sam." I say motioning to Sam who is still sitting on the couch.

"Hi I'm Rylie," the man says.

The room falls quite for a moment before I ask, "so are you the one who is going to sign us in?" Sam gives me a curious look, seeming surprised at how well I lied about knowing who he is.

"No, i don't work here, I'm just visiting. My aunt runs the place," he says.

"Oh, Leah the one who let us in?" Sam asks jumping into the conversation. She gives me a look as if I was challenging her by taking the lead. This gives me an idea. I'm tired of Sam avoiding me. I'm going to get her mad. I want her to fight back.

"Yeah, So what brings a young couple like you all the way out to the middle of nowhere?" he asks.

"What makes you think we're a. . ?" Sam says before I cut her off.

"We're going to Chicago." Sam looks back at me curiously.

"Oh for like vacation?" he asks.

"No, we're going so I can meet her family." I say giving Sam a little Smile.

"Oh really that should be fun."

"Yeah I'm going to ask for permission to marry her." Sam's face falls. I see her fists clench, she looks like she's going to kill me. I did it I made her mad. I made Sam mad. Wait I just made Sam mad, she's going to kill me.

Just then Leah enters the room with a big book. She sets it on the table and I see a long list of names. I glance back at Sam and I see she struggling to keep her self under control. She knows that she can't blowup in front of Leah and Rylie and she is trying hard not to strangling me right now.

"Here you go just sign in and I'll show you to your room." Leah says in a very genital and inviting voice, not picking up on the tension between Sam and I. I try to ignore the look Sam is shooting me and grab the pen Leah is handing me. I sign the book and I tell Rylie it was nice to meet him. Leah starts to show us to our room.

**Sam's POV**

Who does he think he is? 'ask permission to marry me.' Why did he say that? What's his problem? He's lucky that I didn't tear him apart, if it weren't for Leah I definitively would have. Just wait till we're in the room. Leah slides a key into the door of our room. "Here you go," she shows us into the room. "Thanks for doin this," she says just above a whisper. Leah walks out and closes the door be hind her. I look to Freddie he looks scared and for good reason. Without warning I lunge at him, but he jumps out of the way at the last second.

"Sam stop!" he yells as I start to chase him around the room. "Sam . . . Sam no!" he picks up a chair and holds it between us.

"What was all that about!" I yell.

"I was trying to get you mad."

"That was a mistake," I say knocking the chair out of his hands and grabbing his arm to twist behind his back. But before I Know what's going on I feel Freddie's leg slip behind mine and he pushes me flat on the floor. I'm shocked I can't believe the nub actually but me down. He jumps on top of me and pins my hands to the ground.

"I know it was a mistake and I know your going to kill me for it, but at least now I have your attention."

"What do you mean?"

"Ever since I showed up you've been avoiding me or just pretending I don't exist and I'm sick of it. If I have to take a butt wiping to get your attention then fine, but I can't handle you pretending like I'm not here."

"Why do you even care?"

"Sam I told you before I do care about you. I searched everywhere for you when you left. I even asked your uncle Carmine and you know how much he scars me."

"So what, you just want me to beat you up all the time?"

"No, I want things to go back to the way they were."

"So you want me to beat you up all the time." That made Freddie laugh a little. "I don't think things can go back."

"Well then lets start over, let's be something diffident. But I can't stand not having you in my life." I look into his eyes. I know every word he is saying is true. Honestly I don't want him out of my life ether and I think that if we start over things could actually workout to us being friends.

"OK, lets give it a shot. Start completely over." he looks satisfied with my answer. I realize he is still sitting on top of me. " When did you get so strong?"

"I know impressive right," he says in a gloating tone. Quickly I shove my knee up underneath him and flip him flat on his back. I kick my legs over my head and land on the middle of his stomach.

"Not as impressive as mama nub." I say giving him a firm slap on the cheek. I get up and leave him laying flat on the floor.

* * *

><p>i know, i know. I'm late updating. this story is getting hard to write. Trying to think of ways for the Seddie moments to happen honest and true is hard.<p>

But i will try my hardest to make sure that the next chapter doesn't take to long to come out.

I love Reviews and thanks to all who have. let me know what you think.


	16. The Next Morning

**Sam's POV**

I'm sitting in the windowsill looking out. A few feet away from me is Freddie, sleeping in the chair I banished him to after I claimed the bed as my own. He starts to wake up. His eyes blink the sleep away and he looks at me with a smile. "Good morning," he says a little rasp in his voice.

"Good morning." I say. He stands and stretches trying to loosen his back from sleeping on the lumpy chair. He walks over and sits next to me on the windowsill.

"What ya lookin at?" he says looking at me as I turn back to the to the window.

"Nothing really, just everything. You can see the grove from here." I point to the horizon where you can just see the smallest outline of the tree.

"Yeah," I look over at Freddie and it looks like he's lost in thought. I want to ask his something but I'm not sure how to ask it. After last night I really want to give this starting over thing a try. Finally I feel the best way to handle it is to get it out of the way.

"Freddie, yesterday when I said I owe Leah, you said you did to. What do you owe her for?" Freddie's expression tightens. He pauses for a long moment, like he is deciding if he wants to tell me.

"A little wile back, I was going through a bad time. There where some big changes in my life and she helped me through it. She was there for me even when I felt Jennifer and Jeff couldn't be."

"When was this?" I ask. Trying to get more out of him.

"About . . . Two years ago now."

"You didn't seem any different."

"Well this all happened around here. It's like a different world around here. I've always thought of this place as a second life. Some place where I can just leave everything else behind. And I leave all this stuff here when I go back to Seattle."

"So what was it that happened?" I see Freddie's face turn harsh as he replays some memory in his head. He looks at me and he seems almost broken.

"It doesn't matter it's in the past. I think I'd rather focus on what's happening now." he stands and walks over to the bed and sits.

"Freddie, why aren't you in school right now. It has to of started already." the words just popped out of my mouth. I figured since he's already sharing why not get all my questions out of the way.

He scratches his head and looks away. "I ah . . . I was at school. I mean I started, but I left."

"But why would you . . ." I was interrupter by a knock at the door. Freddie quickly jumps up and answers it to find Leah with a big tray full of breakfast food. Freddie lets her in and takes the tray from her.

"I just wanted to bring you guys your breakfast and say thank to you again. This really means a lot to me." Leah says. She turns and makes her way back to the door.

"Yeah, no problem any time." Freddie says slipping me a slight smile.

Leah stops at the door and looks back to Freddie, "oh and Freddie I still need that fence fixed when you get a chance."

"Yeah OK," he says.

"Rylie has decided to go home early so maybe you could do it before you leave." She adds.

"Yeah I'll look at it," Freddie says. Freddie sets the tray of food down on the table to the right of the bed. He takes the cover off the tray to reveal eggs, pancakes, waffles and bacon. Freddie sits and starts to make himself a plate. I can tell he doesn't want to revisit the discussion we just had so I let it go. I sit down and Freddie sets the plate he has been building in front of me.

"What is this for?" I ask.

"For you." he says plainly. I look at the plate and I see that most of the food that Leah brought is on my plate. "I know what you like," he adds. I chuckle to my self a little.

"I guess I'm not as big a mystery as I though." I joke.

"No, I just know you," he says a slight hint of pride in his voice. We finish breakfast and go down stairs in time to see Rylie leaving. Freddie decides he is going to go look at the fence and see what he can do. I stay in with Leah who decides to make us some tea.

"So why did you come yesterday?" Leah asks as she brings the tea kettle to the table.

"What do you mean?" I ask.

"Don't get me wrong I love when you come over. I was just expecting to see Freddie by himself, so I thought you had a reason for coming."

"Well I did. I was freaking out about the whole Freddie thing and . . ." Leah starts to talk over he top of me before I can finish my thought.

"You mean that you like him?"

"What? No." I say shocked by her statement.

"But you do like him right?" I look behind me and to the front door to make sure Freddie was still outside.

"No . . . I mean I did but that was back in Seattle. I'm kind of with Joey now."

"Right Joey. So what problem did you have with Freddie?" She says before sitting back and sipping her tea.

"I was just not sure how to handle being around him and living with him. But it's OK we handled it last night."

"How'd you do that."

"We decided that we're going to start over, forget the past and start new." Leah stands and starts to walk across the kitchen.

"Well let me know how that works out for ya."

"What do you mean?"

"Nothing. Come on let's go see how Freddie's doin on the fence." she says dismissing my question. What did she mean? Does she not thing this will work, because this will work. Me and Freddie can handle starting over, and besides it's really the only option we have right now.

We go outside to find Freddie working on the fence.

"So how's it lookin out there?" Leah yells as we walk up to Freddie. He turns around and looks up from his work.

"Well it looks like the support posts are OK. But I'll need some lumber to fix the rest of it." Freddie says turning back to the fence. He does seem kind of hot when he does real manly work. Wait, no I'm not going down this road again. I shake my head to get rid of the thought. I look away to keep myself from getting any more ideas. In the distance I see six horses standing in the field. They are mainly all brown except for one who has white and black splotches all over. Its head has two black patches on ether side of its face and a white stripe that runs from the top of its head down to its nose. Its mane is long and black starting from the top of it's head but half way down it's neck the mane turns bright white.

"Whose horses are those?" I ask pointing to them in the distance.

"Those don't belong to anyone they're wild. The same ones that knocked down my fence." Leah says. The black and white horse moves its head and it looks like it's staring at me. There is something different about that horse, I don't know what it is but this horse is different. Freddie and Leah talk for a little longer about how to fix the fence. Eventually the horses walk off into the distance. Once Fredison and Leah where done. We decided it was time to go home. On the drive back Frednub starts talking about what kind of sand paper he's going to use on the fence. It gets annoying so I hit him. He starts lecturing me on how I shouldn't hit people while they're driving. So I hit him again. He reaches over and slaps my arm. It's on now; me and him start slap fighting. We're going back and forth the fight starts to get more intense and suddenly Freddie loses control of the car and we swerve off the road. We both start screaming at the top of our lungs. Freddie hits the break and we eventually come to a stop. The car falls quiet. Freddie and I look at each other and break out laughing. After a wile we calm down enough that Freddie drive the rest of the way home us still laughing all the way. As we pull up to the house I see Joey walking out from the barn. I get out of the car and he walks over to me.

"Hey Sam," Joey says as he gets close to me. "Hey Freddie," he adds, his voice flat and insincere. Freddie waves without even looking back as he walks to the house.

"Where were you? I came by to see if we could hang out but Jennifer said you weren't home." He says.

"Me and Freddie stayed the night at Leah's last night." I say.

"Why?"

"Leah's nephew was visiting so she needed us to pretend to be costumers."

"Both of you?"

"Yeah . . . Well actually she just called Freddie over but I ended up going along with it once I got there."

"Wait so you spent the night with Freddie?" he says accusingly.

"Yeah, and?" I say shocked.

"Oh so I guess it's not that big a deal then?"

"It's not."

"Well what am I suppose to think. You wont call us handing out dating, you wont call me your boy friend, and you obviously have no problem spending the night with another Guy," he says his voice getting louder and more aggressive.

"Nothing happened with me and Freddie." I say trying to calm him down. He turns and takes a step away from me trying to collect himself. "I know I've been difficult with the whole are we aren't we thing, and I'm sorry. But I've been thinking lately maybe we should do the whole boyfriend girlfriend thing. You know become . . . official."

He turns back to me. He just stands there looking at me. Like he's trying to figure out what he wants to do. "You swear noting happened between you and Freddie?" he asks.

"Yes. I made him sleep on a chair."

"OK," he reaches over and pulls me into a hug. "And I'm sorry about goin off like that. It's not you. There's always been this . . . rivalry between me and Freddie."

"Why?" I ask.

"Well I don't want to say anything bad. You and Freddie are kind of friends right?"

"Tell me." I push him on.

"Well it's always about him when he's around, he has a quick temper and he's just kind of a jerk."

I'm shocked, this can't be the same Freddie I know the. The Freddie I know is nothing but a nerd. "I've known Freddie for a long time and that doesn't sound like him."

"Well I don't know maybe he's a different guy when he's in Seattle. All I know is around here Freddie's not afraid of stirring up trouble."

Freddie's words from this morning play through my head, ' It's like a different world around here. I've always thought of this place as a second life . . . I leave all this stuff here when I go back to Seattle.' how am I supposed to know who he is around here. He said it, this is his second life and I don't know this Freddie. I mean can he really be a completely different guy?

* * *

><p>So here's a little something. Nothing too big has happened, a little more Seddie which is nice and i love writing for Leah. As lost and confused anyone else is Leah seem to always be one step ahead. and we get to see a little conflict between Sam and Joey, but they come out stronger than ever.<p>

I love to know what you think, so tell me. Please review.


	17. Old Rivals

**Freddie's POV**

Yesterday was a hard day of work. I started with working in the grove in the morning and went on to fix the porch swing that Sam broke when she through me into it. It hurt, but it does feel good that things are getting better with Sam. It's a slow process but I think we're doing well so far. After the swing I went to Leah's and finally after two weeks was able to fix her fence. By the time I got home everyone else was in bed, so I just went to my room and crashed on my bed not bothering to change out of my dirty clothes.

* * *

><p>My eyes crack open slowly. I slid myself to the end of my bed and let my feet fall to the floor. I force myself to stand up and walk to the bathroom my eyes still mostly closed. I take my shirt off and open the door to the bathroom. I turn on the sink and start splashing water on my face. Suddenly I hear someone behind me scream my name, "Freddie!" I turn around and see Sam peeking out from behind the shower curtain. I can see her silhouette through the curtain. I can't take my eyes off of her. I feel my hands start to shake and the feeling quickly moves to the rest of my body as I begin to panic. I try to speak but I just stammer like an idiot. Sam's voice pierces through my thoughts, "Freddie, get out!" without any further hesitation I run out of the bathroom as fast as I can.<p>

I can't believe I just walked in on Sam in the shower. She's going to kill me. I hear the water shut off and a moment later I see Sam storm into my room wearing only a towel. I quickly look away. "I didn't see anything, I'm sorry. I was half awake and I wasn't thinking." I say still full of panic.

"Oh so you didn't do it on purpose." she says accusingly. I can hear from her voice that she is still next to the bathroom door.

"Of course not, you'd kill me and plus it's not right." I say still facing the other way.

"Freddie, look at me."

"I can't."

"What do you mean you can't"

"Just trust me I can't look at you right now."

"Your such a girl." she says as I hear footsteps coming closer to me. Before I have a chance to react she grabs me by the wrist and spins me around. I try to avoid her but she slams me against the wall. "Look at me." she says again only more demanding. I look directly into her eyes and she stairs right back into mine. My eyes track down to the rest of her body and my breath catches in my throat. Without even knowing it my hand finds it's way to her hip. She responds with a hand on my chest. My eyes move back to hers and I feel myself inching closer to her. She closes her eyes, but before we get any closer the door to my room starts to open. Sam's eyes flash open and she jumps back from me. The door opens to reveal Tara standing in the hall.

"Hey Freddie I was just wondering . . . Oh my god I'm sorry." she say before slamming the door closed.

Sam looks over at me in the most awkward moments of my life. She turns and rushes into the bathroom closing the door behind her.

**Sam's POV**

What did I almost do? I was about to kiss Freddie and I'm naked, well almost. I couldn't control myself. When he looked into my eyes all rational thought left my brain. And when he started checking me out . . . He was so hot. When did he get muscles, I couldn't help but touch his chest. But he started it when he grabbed my side. We where so close to kissing, if only Tara . . . No no no I'm not doing this. Me and Freddie are not a thing, I'm sure he's with Carly and I'm with Joey. I take a deep breath to calm myself and start to wipe the fog off of the mirror.

**Joey's POV**

Things are going good with me and Sam, even with Freddie around. I don't get it, every time he comes around everyone makes such a big deal. I've never really liked the guy but I put on a nice face around Jeff and Jennifer. They can't get enough of him so it's just one of those things I have to live with. And don't get me wrong it's not like its a one way street I know Freddie doesn't like me ether. He has let me know plenty of times. And the way he looks at Sam. . . Just the idea of him trying to weasel his way in with her after I spent all this time getting in good with her.

Right now I'm on my way to meet up at the Newman's so we all can go to the Fair together. The fair rolls through town about once a year, if we're lucky. but it's fun, just about the funnest thing in this town. I spend about four months a year at the other ranches my family owns. They're scattered allover Montana and lets just say Cherriesville isn't the most existing place I've ever been. So everyone shows up when the fair comes through. I get to the house and walk up to the door. Jennifer answers it and lets me in. Tara comes walking down the stairs with an odd look on her face. "Hey is Sam up there?" I ask as she reaches the bottom step. She gives me a surprised.

"No," she says quickly. "I mean yeah . . . she's getting ready. She'll be down soon."

"Are you OK, you look a little pale."

"Yeah I just . . . didn't get a lot of sleep last night." she says in an unsure tone. "Come on lets get breakfast." she grabs my arm with hers and pulls me into the kitchen.

After a few minutes Sam comes downstairs and into the kitchen. She stops when she sees me; like she's surprised I'm here. "Hey there you are." I say as I get up and give her a hug and a peck on the cheek.

"Hey" she says. I see Freddie making his way down the stairs. He stops and turns away when he sees us. I have to admit seeing his reaction makes me feel good. I give Sam an extra little squeeze as Freddie goes for the front door and walks out side. Me and Sam go over to the table and finish breakfast without any sight of Freddie.

**Freddie's POV**

Man I hate that guy. I can't believe Sam is dating him. I don't know why I'm the only one who can see through his stupid act. I try to cool off by going to the barn. Inside I see bear with his head out of his stable. I walk over and rub his nose. "Hey buddy how ya doin," I say. He stamps his foot. "No, sorry not today." I say knowing he wants to go for a run. "Let me ask you something. Do you like Joey?" Bear snorts and shakes my hand off his nose. "Well that makes two of us."

After a little more time with bear I start to muck out the stables before we leave for the Fair. About half way through I hear someone enter the barn I look out from Mary Ann's stable and see Alexa. "Hey what's up?" I say as I walk out of the stall.

"Nothin, I just heard someone in here so I came to find out who." she says.

"Well it's just me. I thought I would muck out the stables before we go out to the Fair."

"Do you want some help?" I'm a little shocked usually Alexa doesn't offer to help.

"Sure, if you want." between the two of us we made short work of the stables. I start putting all the tools away when Alexa asks me a question I thought she never would.

"Freddie, do you ever think about us?" I stop in my tracks.

"What?" I ask as I turn to face her.

"Us, do you ever think about us?"

"Alexa that was a long time ago."

"I know, but I just think . . . maybe we didn't give it a fair chance." I walk over to her.

"You remember how it ended right?"

"yeah but it was fun for a while."

"You never trusted me. And plus you were the one who told me that I don't know how to have fun."

"Well yeah but your different now."

"No, I'm the same guy and you're the same girl. We're just not right for each other. Not to mention the way Joey flipped out."

"Oh yeah there was that." she says rolling her eyes. "I guess your right. But we did have some good times."

"Yeah we did, Lexy" she smiles at the mention of the nickname from years ago. Just then Tara pokes her head in to the barn

"Hey what are you guys doin in here?" Tara asks.

I look over to her and Alexa turns a little startled that she didn't see her come in. "we just finished mucking out the stables." I say.

"Oh, well we're getting ready to leave." Tara says pointing out the front of the barn.

"Yeah, I'll be right there. You guys go ahead, I'll put this stuff away and be right out." I say gesturing to the tools in my hands. The girls go out to wait I put away the tools. I leave the barn and see half of everyone getting into Jennifer's car. She looks over to me.

"Hey Freddie is it OK if you drive everyone else." Jennifer says throwing me my keys. I look at who's left. I see Alexa, Sam and Joey. Jennifer always does this; she finds ways to put Joey and I together. She thinks that if we spend more time together we'll get along.

I reluctantly get into the car. Jennifer pulls out first and I fallow close behind. The Fair is set up on the other side of town so we have about a twenty-minute drive. The ride is real awkward. From the incident with Sam this morning to the talk with Alexa and Joey giving me crazy eyes from he back seat. Most of the ride is silent I can hear Sam and Joey talking in the back, but they make sure to stay quiet enough so no one else knows what they're saying. Joey sees me looking at them through my rear view mirror.

Suddenly he starts to speak louder so everyone in the car can hear. "Sam did you know Freddie and Alexa dated for a wile." my hands clench around the steering wheel. He had to bring it up.

"Really?" Sam says, I just stair strait at the road in front of me.

Alexa sees that I'm not going to talk about it and decides to talk her self. "Yeah but it was a long time ago. And it only lasted the summer."

"Oh so it was just like a summer fling?" Sam asks.

"Well I can't speak for Freddie but I think it was a little more than that. Freddie was my first kiss." Alexa says shooting me a little smile. I feel so uncomfortable right now. I hate this conversation.

"Really," Sam says making eye contact with me through my rear view mirror. "He was mine too." I'm shocked she's actually talked about it. I see Joey Squirm in his seat at Sam's last comment. Seeing this I can't help but smile.

"Yeah they were goin good till Freddie dumped her out of the blue." Joey says.

"That's not what happened." I chime in for the first time in the conversation.

"Yeah OK Freddie whatever . . ."

I interrupt before he can finish. "You know why don't you just mind your own business."

"My sister is my business. And what's the matter, you afraid everyone is going to find out your secrets."

"You know what! . . ."

"Stop!" Alexa yells. "Can't you guys ever be around each other without fighting?" we both go silent. The rest of the ride is dead quiet. We finally arrive at the fair and Joey drags Sam over to the rest of the group away from me as fast as he can. Alexa walks over to my side of the car and looks up at me. "So how long have you had a thing for Sam?" I look at her slowly without answering. "My not stupid Freddie. I've been around a lot of yours and Joey's fights and that one was defiantly about a girl."

"I really don't want to talk about this right now. Lets just go to the fair." I say as I start to walk past her to the rest of the group.

"No Freddie you should talk about this." she continues.

I turn around to face her. "I'm not ready to talk about this OK . . . with anyone." she nods her head, walks over and gives me a hug.

"Just know if you want to talk to someone I'm here."

"Thanks," as we start to pull out of the hug I see Sam out of the corner of my eye. She's looking at us from across the parking lot. She's not paying attention to the dancing little girl in front of her or the tall waste of space hanging on her hand, she's just looking Alexa and I.

**Joey's POV**

Sam has seemed a little off today. I guess my little fight with Freddie didn't help things. We all enter the fair with Freddie and Alexa trailing behind. We start going from ride to ride. The roller coaster to the ferris wheel and everything in between. Everyone seemed to be having a good time except for Freddie who was just grumpy all day. As the sun begins to set our large group splits into three smaller groups. Jeff, Jennifer and Chris in one group Freddie and Alexa in another and me Sam and Tara in the last. Sam, Tara and I decide to give the teacups a try. The ride starts out and Sam wastes no time bringing the cup up to speed. We keep going faster and faster. Everything outside the cup is a blur all my eyes can focus on is Sam laughing like an evil scientist as she pushes the cup to it's limits. Finally the ride ends and I run as fast as I can to the bathroom to puck my guts out. After making friends with the toilet I clean my self up and head back out to Sam and Tara. I get to the bathroom door when I hear Tara's voice. "So what was happening with you and Freddie this morning."

"Nothing happened." Sam said plainly.

"You were in his room wearing only a towel and your telling me nothing happened." I can't believe this . . . OK this Freddie situation is over, we're settling this now. I leave the bathroom and sneak around the back of the building. Last I saw Freddie and Alexa were headed to the house of mirrors. I get to the house of mirrors and see Freddie waiting by himself at the exit. I walk over and spin him around.

**Freddie's POV**

"What the hell," I say as I look Joey dead in his eyes.

"What the hell are you trying to pull with Sam?" he says accusingly.

"What are you talking about?"

"I know about the little stunt you pulled with Sam this morning."

"I didn't do anything."

"Whatever just back off." he says raising his voice. "It's obvious you have a little thing for Sam. But come on Freddie you think she'd go for you." I feel the rage build inside of me. "Don't embarrass your self." my fists clench. "Your just going to end up second best as usual." all of a sudden I feel myself lung toward Joey. My fist connects with the side of his head and he falls flat on his back. I stand over the top of him breathing heavy with my fist still clenched.

Out of nowhere I hear someone yell my name. "Freddie!" I see Sam run to Joey's side and start to help him up. "What's wrong with you?" she yells at me. Step back from the scene. I can't believe it, after all that has happened no matter what I do. Shit keeps falling in between Sam and me and every time I move one step closer I end up falling ten steps back. I turn and run from the scene.

* * *

><p>It's getting so hard to write for this story. It's not that i'm loosing interest, it's just finding ways for thing to happen and putting everyone where i want them. Anyway there you go. We get to see a new POV and you get a little more back story on Freddie's life in Cherriesville. Not to mention an awesome Seddie moment.<p>

As you may know i love to read what you think, so let me know. Please review.


	18. Aftermath

Sam's POV

The teacup finally stops spinning and me and Tara step off the ride. Joey bursts past us, headed strait for the bathrooms. I look at Tara and we laugh even harder. "Maybe I should have gone easier on him." I say as our laughter calms down.

"Do you really like him?" Tara asks suddenly becoming more serious.

I look at her, a little put off by her question. " Of course, why would I be dating him if I didn't."

"So what was happening with you and Freddie this morning." I was hoping she wasn't going to bring this up.

"Nothing happened." I say not making eye contact.

"You were in his room wearing only a towel and your telling me nothing happened."

"Yeah," Tara gives me a look like sees not buying it for a second. "OK, this morning Freddie walked in on me in the shower."

"What!"

"Yeah but it was an accident."

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah I trust Freddie. But I was pissed so I followed him back into his room to confront him about It." I left out the part about almost kissing him. Suddenly I see Joey headed over to the house of mirrors. "Look." I say to Tara.

"Is that Joey?" Tara says. "What's he doin over there."

"I don't know. Lets go see." we start to walk over to the house of mirrors as Joey rounds the back of the building. As we get closer I hear Joey yell, "Whatever just back off." I look at Tara and she looks just as unsure as I am. We pick up pace and run around the building. We arrive just in time to see Freddie's right hook to Joey's jaw. I'm shocked by what I see. Freddie is just standing over Joey looking more intimidating than I have ever seen him. I yell out his name from behind him, "Freddie!" I run over to see if Joey is OK. I start to help him up. I look back at Freddie, "what's wrong with you?" I turn back to Joey and set him all the way up. I stand up and turn to Freddie to give him a peace of my mind but when I look back Freddie is gone. Me and Tara help Joey to his feet and head toward the food court. Alexa runs up from behind us, "Oh my god what happened." she says looking at Joey.

"Freddie," Tara says.

"Come on let's sit him down at those tables." I say. Joey sits down at the table. He still looks out of it. Freddie must of hit him hard. "I'll go get some ice." I say.

"I'll go with you." Alexa says. We go over to a nearby food stand. "So what exactly happened?" she asks

"I don't really know. Me and Tara saw Joey going over to the house of mirrors so we followed him. He went around to the exit. Then we heard Joey yell at Freddie to back off so we hurried up and ran around the building and saw Freddie level Joey."

"So where's Freddie now?"

"I don't know. He took off." Alexa looks off and Shakes her head like she slipping deep into thought. "What's with those two? Why do they hate each other so much."

Alexa looks back at me as we start to walk back over to Joey. "They actually used to be friends, before Freddie had his accident."

"What accident?" I say stopping halfway from the food stand to Joey.

"I assume you know about the taco truck incident, right?"

"Yeah, I was there."

"And you know he broke his hand and his leg, well that summer when he came here it took a wile till he was able to ride like he used to. And at this time Joey and Freddie would compete in races . . ."

I interrupt Alexa, "Freddie raced?"

"Yeah and he won quite a bit, some even said he was better than Joey." I can't believe Freddie used to race. This place really was like a second life. And this life seems so good why would he want to go back to Seattle. "But anyway, after Freddie was ridding again he decided that he was goin up to Jasper Falls with Joey to the big Rodeo they have every year. They both made it to the final race and it was a close one, until the final turn Freddie was in the lead and then something spooked Bear he broke stride and tossed Freddie. When Freddie landed he reinjured his leg and that stopped him from competing. He wasn't able to ride the same again."

"What spooked Bear?"

"No one was really sure, but Freddie blamed Joey. He said on the last turn Joey made a move to jump out in front of him. He said Joey cut him off and that's what spooked Bear."

"So Freddie thinks Joey intentionally made him fall?"

"Yeah."

"Well what do you think?"

"I didn't see Joey do anything, but Freddie was sure. In fact it turned in to such a big deal that Freddie ended up not staying with Jennifer and Jeff for a wile, because they sided with Joey saying that there was no way he would do something like that."

"Do you think he would?"

"I know my brother better than most and I'd have to say I wouldn't put it past him."

Freddie's POV

I slow down and come to a stop next to the Ferris wheel. Everything that just happened starts to set in. I punched Joey. I have to say it felt good, except for my hand that's throbbing. This won't end well. Everyone is going to know about it, Jennifer and Jeff are going to freak. Just then I hear Leah come up from behind me.

"Hey Freddie how you doin?" she says holding a large cotton candy in one hand.

"I've been better." I say avoiding eye contact.

"What's wrong?" She asks in a concerned tone. I finally look her strait in the eye and take a deep breath. I hold up my right hand to show her my knuckles.

"I punched Joey." I say plainly.

"Really, so are you hiding from him now or what?"

"No he went down when I hit him."

"Well well where did Freddie Benson learn to throw a punch." images of Sam beating me through the years flash in my head.

"I guess I just kind of picked it up."

"So what happened?"

"Joey just . . . He knows what gets to me. And I just lost my temper so I hit him."

"What did he say to make you lose you temper?"

"I don't want to get into it."

"OK so now what?"

"Now? I don't know. Can I stay with you for a wile?"

"Freddie," she says in a concerned voice.

"Just till everyone calms down and I have a chance to do some damage control."

"OK, but you need to deal with this Joey thing, all of it. Because having this come between you and your family is terrible. I just don't want to see all this happen again."

"OK and thanks Leah"

"Not a problem . . . want some cotton candy?"

* * *

><p>I know I know I'm a terrible person you all hate me, but I am trying to get out one chapter a week. All I can say is I'll try harder.<p>

In other news we got to see the punch from Sam's POV and we finally know why Freddie and Joey don't get along. Pulse I also love it when I have a chance to bring Leah around and I love the way she wasn't shocked that Freddie hit Joey, only that he hurt Joey.

Please review.


	19. A Walk In The Woods

**Freddie's POV**

It's been one week since I punched Joey. I've been staying with Leah ever since and I haven't spoken to anyone else. Jennifer came by a few days ago and Alexa the day before that, but I wasn't there. Part of me is glad I didn't have to talk to them. I really don't want to talk to anyone; I haven't even been talking to Leah. Mainly I've been keeping to myself and just doing jobs for Leah around the house. Today I woke up early and I've been chopping wood. The weather has been getting cold the past few days and Leah needs a lot of wood for winter. I just don't know what to do with myself. In some ways being for the most part alone has been good. I've been able to look at everything from another perspective and I've come to a few conclusions. One, I don't like Sam being with Joey, that one was easy. Two, I can't stand what me and Sam have become and three, I know I can't live without her.

The axe goes crashing through the small log, splitting it in half. I have one hand wrapped tightly around the base of the axes handle as it sits embedded in the base log I use as a chopping surface. I stop to catch my breath after chopping almost a third of a cord. I see my breath in the cold air. The sun has just risen and clearly paints the outline for a new day. As much as I want Sam I don't know if I can keep chasing her. I mean I must be insane to have chased her this far, knowing what she thinks of me. But at the same time I'm not sure what she really thinks of me. On the surface she acts like I'm just another nub and I should be grateful that she allows me to talk to her. But the other day when she was in my room . . . I don't know it felt like we had a moment and I'm sure we almost kissed. I pull the axe out of the log, set another peace of wood down and raise the axe over my head. I stop before starting the swing. I just don't know . . . anything anymore. I really don't know what to think. I bring the axe down and drop it next to my feet.

**Sam's POV**

I wake up to the sun fully raised shining through my window. I pull the extra blankets on my bed up and over my head, sealing me in a cocoon of warmth. The house has felt cold lately and not just because of the weather. Ever since Freddie went M.I.A. the house has felt empty. I've known that I liked him in the past but now I just can't stand him not being around.

A couple of days ago I called Carly she was happy to hear from me and it was really good to hear her voice. She told me I should go talk to Freddie. She also told me about how hard me leaving was on him, which surprised me, and through our talks I found out that her and Freddie are not a couple and Carly thinks he has a thing for me. I just rolled my eyes at the thought.

Everyone else in the house I think has been a little off since the incident between Freddie and Joey. Chris has even stopped coming in my room which I think means she's sad, but I can't be sure. Jennifer seems to be taking it the hardest. She is kind of shut off from everyone, she still takes care of the girls, getting them set up for school, which started a few days ago. But you can see that it bothers her.

After what feels like an hour I decide to role my self out of bed. I step on the cold hard wood floor, walk to the bathroom and switch on the light. I take a long look at myself in the mirror. I know it's crazy to think that Freddie has any real feelings for me but I can't help but think he does after the whole shower incident and we . . . well you know. It just stuck in my head and it just has to mean something, right? I don't know what to do with myself anymore. I think I might have to tell someone that I like Freddie . . . or did like him, or whatever. My eyes drift to the other door to the bathroom. Before I know what I'm doing I turn the knob and walking into Freddie's room. The shades are drawn making the room dark, but I don't bother turning on a light. Part of me wants to leave everything the way he left it and the other part just doesn't want anyone to find me in here. The room looks diffident from the first time I wondered in, the bed isn't made and there's a small pile of clothes next to the closet. The closet door is open and inside I can see more clothes and a pare of muddy boots that look like they where just tossed in. at the back I see the same little box I saw the first time I came in. this time my curiosity gets the better of me. I reach to the back of the closet and pull the box out. It's locked. I dig around in my mess of curls until i find the hairpin I never go anywhere without. I work the pin in, I jiggle it up and down before givin it a quick twist to the right and unlocking the box. I lift the lid and see a picture of Freddie ridding Bear. From the look of the picture they where going pretty fast. Under the picture are several first place ribbons and metals for horse racing. Freddie must have been good to get all of these. At the bottom of the box is a little peace of string I reach past all the awards and tug on the string causing the bottom of the box to lift, revealing a hidden compartment. I see a picture of him and Carly sitting in the box. I lift the picture and see that one side has been folded over; I flip it back and see that it's me. He cut me out of the picture. I knew that's how it was, he has always been into Carly and that's the way it will always be. I snap the box close and toss it back into the closet.

**Freddie's POV**

The hot water pounds on the back of my neck. The steam is so thick I can't see my hands. Usually I find hot showers relaxing, but right now it feels like nothing can help me. I miss when things where simple. When I didn't have to deal with Joey and Sam would just make fun of me. But now . . . I just don't know what to do. It seems like the more I try to make things good with Sam the more things get screwed up. Maybe I should just stop trying. I shut off the water and find my towel in the thick mist. What am I saying I can't stop. But it feels like there's nothing left for me to do. I just need to stop obsessing about this. That's it, that's my mission today. I'm going to clear my head just have a day where I don't worry about the rest of the world, only me. I dry myself off and grab some clothes. I know just the place to go to empty my head. I rush down stairs and past Leah. "Hey she says where you goin? You gonna make up with everyone?"

"No I'm gonna go walking in the woods." I say with a smile on my face.

"What? Why?" she asks confused.

"There's someplace I need to be."

"OK," she says not bothering to understand what I'm doing. "Are you going to be back for dinner?"

"Probably not."

"OK have fun walking in the woods." I turn and start running to the front door.

"I will!" I yell back as I burst through the door. I run around to the back of the house and head for the creek that runs for miles all the way from here through town and on.

**Sam's POV**

After finding the picture I didn't feel like doing anything. I couldn't even face Jennifer so I snuck out and started walking though the grove. The air is chilly and my thin sweatshirt barley is enough to keep me warm the sky is mostly clear. Only a few puffy white clouds dot the sky. The sun shines down through the trees. A breeze shakes the trees making the shadows on the ground dance. I see the trail that leads down to the creek and I decide to wonder down there. I can't get that stupid picture out of my head. I need to talk to someone about it. I can't go to Leah because that's where Freddie is. I pull out my cell, which has been my lifeline to Carly. I have no choice I have to tell her what's going on. I press one on the speed dial and wait for the line to pick up. "Hey Sam what's up?" I hear Carly's chipper voice ring out through the phone.

"Hey Carls I need some advice."

"Sure what's the problem?"

"Well . . . OK first I need to tell you something." my heat beat picks up. I'm nervous to tell her about everything that has been really going on. "I had a thing for Freddie, or maybe still do." I pull the phone away from my ear when Carly starts to squeal into the phone.

"I knew it! Since when? Did you make a move? Did he?" she continues to screen into the phone.

"Carly calm down that's not the problem. The problem is I know he dosn't like me."

"How do you know? Did you guys talk?"

"No"

"Than how can you know for sure." the bushes clear revealing the creek and I start walking along the bank.

"I found a picture. It was of the three of use, well at least it was before he cut me out of it."

"No he didn't?"

"Yeah, so it was just a picture of you two."

"I'm sorry. Wait why would he cut you out of the picture."

"So it was just he and you."

"But he has a lot if pictures of just the two of us. Why would he take a picture of the three of use and cut you out? It doesn't make since."

"Well he did."

"Or"

"Or what"

"Or maybe he cut himself and me out of the picture so he had a picture of just you."

"No, why would he do that?"

"I'm telling you he likes you. Think about it he has plenty pictures of me and him, but he has none of just you."

"But . . . No he . . . Hey your suppose to be helping me make sense of all this not add to it."

"Well I'm sorry but isn't it possible." I can't bring myself to say it but it is possible I guess but after all this other chiz happened I don't know if I can let myself believe it. " Sam are you still there?" I hear Carly's voice call over the phone, snapping me back from my thoughts.

"Yeah I . . . I have to go. I'll call you latter thanks."

"Wait there's something I need to tell you. I don't want to pile a bunch more on top of you but you need to know. Its about when Melanie, Freddie and I where looking for you . . ."

**Freddie's POV**

I hop to the large rock in the water, grab a low hanging branch and swing to the other side of the creek. This is just what I needed. I love coming down here. When I was younger Jeff and I camped somewhere out here for a week. We spent all of our time building a tree house that I was never able to find again. Maybe that's what I'll do today, yeah I'm going to find that old tree house. I remember there was a large bolder that was close to our camp sight maybe if I try to look for that it will be easier to find. I walk up to a very tall tree. I might be able to spot it from the top of this tree. I pull myself onto the first branch; it's been a long time since I climbed a tree like this. I work my way through the branches until I'm about two-thirds the way up the tree. The branches thin out and I find an opening that make for a good vantage point. I start slowly scanning the land looking for any clue to where I should start. My eyes run along the creek and stop when I see someone walking in my direction. I strain my eyes to make out who it is. Is that Sam? What is she doing out here. I climb down and start to follow the creek in her direction. I see her in the distance; she has stopped walking and is now just sitting on the bank. I approach slowly so she doesn't hear me coming. As I get closer I see it looks like she's sad. I slow down but continue to move forward. I'm only about ten yards away from her now. I call out her name, "Sam," feeling concerned about why she's sad. She turns and looks at me. Her glare stops me in my tracks. She stands up and charges at me. Before I know it her right fist connects with the left side of my face and I fall flat on my back. I lift my head from the ground, still dizzy from the hit, and see Sam step over me and begin to storm off. "Sam wait." I say as I stumble to get up and start to go after her. She turns around quickly and pushes me causing me to almost fall back down.

"Why didn't you tell me!" she yells accusingly.

"Tell you what?" I ask standing back up strait.

"You didn't tell me you found my dad!" Oh my god. How did she know that she must have been talking to Carly.

"Sam I was going to tell you. I just . . . " she interrupts.

"Save it," she says starting to turn back around.

"No Sam I . . . " she interrupts me again but this time it's with another punch. As before I fall to the ground. This time I can't even see strait to try and watch her walk away. But she doesn't leave; instead she walks over and pulls me up by my shirt so I'm face to face with her.

"Your going to take me to where you found him." is what I hear before she throws me back down into the dirt.

* * *

><p>Here is the part where I should say I'm sorry for taking so long to update. But I think I say sorry too much. So instead I will make a promise. I promise to have a new chap. up by Tuesday. Those of you who like this story please stick with me. I just figured out how the story will end up and trust me it will good.<p>

Reviews mean a lot so if you can let me know what you think that would be great. Please review.


	20. A Trip To Nevada

**Freddie's POV**

The air rushes past the car and through the slightly cracked window causing a slight whistle and the low buzz from the radio station falling out can barely be heard over the hum of the wheels speeding across the pavement. But one sound you won't hear as I drive Sam and I to Nevada, is talking. Not one of use has said a word in the past ten hours. The silence isn't awkward it's more tense. I knew I should have told her about her dad its just with finding her then all the other chiz that kept coming up it felt like there was no time to tell her. But that's no excuse. I should have told her. I know if it were about my dad I would want to know right away. She's really mad she's barely even looked at me since we left. But there is one more thing I have to tell her. I clear my throat to break the silence before I talk. "There's something else you should know before we get there." I say. She just continues to stair out her window. "Sam? . . Sam look at me." she doesn't even move. Frustrated I pull the car over and stop on the side of the empty free way. "Sam this is important." she turns to look at me.

"Ok what?" she says.

"When we started tracking your dad down we first found that he pulled a guy from a car wreck in Carson City Nevada. We found the guy he saved and it turned out that they kept in contact for some years after. He told us that your dad ended up in Fallon Nevada so that's where we went next. Fallon is where we found him."

"OK good take me there," she says flatly.

"There's more . . . Sam he died three years ago." Sam's face freezes. "I'm sorry Sam." she looks away back out her window.

"can you take me to him now." she says quietly.

"Sure," I say. I put the car in drive and start down the road again.

The pat of wet grass is all that can be heard. Small steel plates set in granite outline isles in the field. I stop and turn to Sam, but she doesn't look at me. I point to one of the Steel plates and she walks a few steps closer. She stands there for a wile without saying a word. Finally she asks, "how did he die?"

"There was a fire where he worked." I hear someone say behind me. Both Sam and I turn around to see Melanie.

"What are you doing here?" Sam asks confused.

"Carly told me you guys where coming here so I decided to meet you," she says as she walks closer to Sam, giving me a slight nod and smile in passing. She motions to the small plate with the name Timothy Puckett etched in. "everyone else got out of the building. The report said he was helping people get out when the roof collapsed." Sam looks back at the gravestone. She just shakes her head and starts to walk back to the car.

I decided that since I had to drive strait through the night to get here it would be best to stay in a hotel for the night so I don't drive off the road. Melanie decides to stay with us for the night. We find the only hotel we know. I get two rooms so there won't be any . . . awkwardness. The two rooms are right next to each other with a doorway that connects them. I give the girls the keys to there room and we head off to the rooms. I walk into my room and drop on the bed. This whole situation sucks. I feel like an idiot for not telling her and I feel useless because I didn't know what to say to let her know I'm sorry and that I'm here for her. I hear a few light taps on the door that joins to the other room. I spring up from the bed and make my way to the door. I open the door to see Melanie. "We have to stop meeting like this." Melanie says. We both let out a slight chuckle.

"How you doin." I ask.

"I'll be alright," she says, but I can see how much this bothers her. I see Sam stand up behind her and walk toward the door.

"Where ya goin?" I ask.

"For a walk. I need to be alone." she says and leaves before I have a chance to say another word.

**Sam's POV**

I walk along the street. Every once in a wile a car will go rushing past causing a rush of air to blow my hair in front of my face. The sidewalk is broken and uneven so I have to really watch where I step. I really don't know what to think about . . . Anything any more. When I found out that they found my dad I think I was in shock more than anything. When Freddie found me next to the creek I kinda just let it all come down on him. I'm not mad at Freddie, I mean he should have told me and I'm not happy that he didn't, but really I'm just worked you over my dad. Over the years I thought about finding him. I thought about what I would say to him. How I would tell him about what him leaving did to us. But now I don't have that chance and I guess I feel . . . Cheated. Not knowing about him has been such a big part of my life. And now I don't know I guess knowing just doesn't feel how I thought it would. A car rushes past blowing my hair like before pulling me out of my thoughts. I push my hair back down. A sign in front of me catches my eye '$2.99 breakfast.' I need waffles, yeah waffles sound good.

**Freddie's POV**

Melanie and I have been sitting in my room watching T.V. Waiting for Sam to come back. Melanie and I talked a bit but we have already been through this and there are not many things left to say. She asked me about my aunt's house. So I told her about the farm and what it's like. I told her about Sam and Joey and what happened at the fair. She did the whole "oh I'm sorry, that suck" thing but I really didn't want to talk about it any more so now we're just watched T.V.

I hear the door to the other room open and close. "That must be Sam." Melanie says. "I'm gonna go talk to her." I give her a nod and she heads over to the other room. She leaves the door open and I can still hear her talking.

"Hey how ya doin?" Melanie asks.

"Yeah fine." I hear Sam say, a flat tone in her voice.

"Are you sure I mean its OK if your not. I know I wasn't when I found out." Melanie continues.

"What do you want me to say? Do you want me to say that I'm sad he's dead? That I'll never get to know who he was, or maybe you want to hear the truth, that all I ever wanted from him was to see the look on his face when I show up and tell him what a peace of trash he was for leaving us." Sam says sounding angry and bitter.

"Come on Sam you don't mean that." I can hear the concern in Melanie's voice.

"I don't?"

"Sam you heard about him pulling that guy out of that car and he helped save those people from that fire. He couldn't of been that bad of a guy."

"Melanie he left us"

"Come on at some point your going to have to let that go."

"Yeah you would say that." I start walking over to the door. I'm shocked by what Sam is saying.

"What's that suppose to mean?"

"You left too. You left us for your stupid boarding school." I can see through the door and Melanie looks broken by Sam's words. She turns and runs out of the room. I step through the doorway. Sam looks directly at me and I can tell she knows I heard everything.

"Sam that was really harsh." I say.

"What ever." she says trying to dismiss me.

"No, Melanie didn't deserve that."

"Every thing I said was true."

"Do you still not get it? Sam you left us! You left!" I say letting myself get heated.

"That was different."

"Sam there's a million reasons you can say why you left, why she left or even why he left but the bottom line is sometimes people get scared and do stupid things. God I'm so sick of this." I say gesturing at her.

"Well if you're so sick of me why are you still hangin around."

"I'm not sick of you. I'm sick of who you've become. Do you realize since I found you we've only fought once."

"Maybe I'm just diffident now!" she says getting defensive.

"No, I can see the old Sam fighting to get out. The old Sam is the one who through me down yesterday and that day at Leah's."

"Stop it." I can see the fire burning behind her eyes.

"It was the old Sam that was ready to kick the chiz out of me when I punched Joey."

"I told you to stop." she says charging at me and slamming me into the wall.

"Look at your self Sam. Does anyone else bring this kind of fight out of you, this kind of passion? Does Joey? This is who you really are Sam . . . and this iswho o fell in love with.

* * *

><p>Yay I love it and I was on time well kind of. If its not Tuesday where you are then i'm sorry but it is where I am so i'm counting it a a victory.<p>

I know you have something to say about this chapter and I want to hear it so. please review.


	21. A Day At The Hotel

**Freddie's POV**

. . . and this is who I fell in love with.

Oh my god. Did I just tell Sam I love her? Time seems to slow down. This is the first time I've said that, I mean even to my self. But it's true. That's the only to say it; I am completely, undeniably in love with her. But what do I do now. I mean I just found this out at the same time as her. Maybe I should try and cover this up . . . no I meant what I said and I'm tired of playing these games. I'm going to own up to what I said, I have to.

"What?" Sam says barley above a wispier. Her grip on me starts to loosen.

Here's my moment. "You heard me. Sam I'm in love with you. And I have been for a long time. I know its crazy but . . ." I don't get to finish my thought because Sam pulls my head down and caches my lips in a kiss. Any words that I might have said vanish from my mind. I rap my arms around her and pull her body closer to mine. She pulls her head back.

"Wait your right this is crazy." she says.

"I know." I say as I move my hand to the back of her head and pull her back into a kiss. I spin us around so I have her pined to the wall. She slides her hands up against my chest and around my neck. I reach one hand down behind her knee and pull her up into the air. She raps her legs around my waist and pushes her self off the wall. I stumble before falling back on one of the beds. Sam sits up on her knees over me. She reaches down. Grabbing the bottom of my shirt. She pulls the shirt over my head causing us to break apart for a moment. Sam pins my hands down over my head and continues kissing me. I stop and pull away. She sits up and looks at me.

"What?" she asks.

"What about Joey?" I ask.

"Joey who?" she says with the best answer I could have ever hoped for. I lean up with my hands still pined and she meets me half way. I feel her grip on my right hand loosen slightly and decide to capitalize. I slip my hand free and roll her over on her back with me on top, never breaking the kiss. She laughs into the kiss. I slip my hand under her shirt and let my fingers graze her stomach. She lets out a slight moan. Suddenly I see exactly where this is going and I pull away.

"Are you OK?" I ask.

"Yeah." she says catching her breath.

"Sam?" I push a little more.

"I mean, I think so." She says.

"Maybe we should wait until all this cools down and you know your ready." I say brushing a long curl out of her face.

"OK" She says. I roll to one side and lay next to her. She turns to face me and we just lay there looking at each other for what feels like the first time. "Freddie." she says.

"Yeah"

"I love you too."

**Sam's POV**

I take in a deep breath as I feel myself ease awake. I don't even open my eyes. I just try and fall back asleep. I try to roll over but can't. I feel someone's arm around me. My eyes shoot open and I look to my right. I see Freddie asleep in my curly mess of hair and his arm wrapped tight around me. I move a little and he just pulls me tighter. It's like he's afraid to let me go. I feel a smile break across my face. I remember all that happened earlier. I really do love him, nothing else matters. Me running away, being with Joey and even all this chiz about my dad, it doesn't matter because we're in love. Wow that was maybe the corniest thing I ever thought. But hey what do you expect from the girl who fell for Freddie Benson.

I feel Freddie start to move slightly before I see his eyes open. He stretches his arms and legs then wraps them back around me. "Hey," he says. With a smile that matches mine.

"Hey," I say back.

"Your Pretty," he says in a little kid's voice.

"Oh my god," I say wile shaking my head. "Is this what I have to look forward to."

"What?" he says a little defensively.

"Are you gonna start getting all cutesy with me all the time?"

"No, not all the time. Just most of the time." he says with a big smile. He pulls me closer and places a light kiss on my lips. I feel his hand run down my side to the top of my hip until I jerk away. "What, are you OK?" he asks concerned.

"Yeah," I say. "I just . . ." I pause not wanting to say what happened.

"Wait, are you ticklish." he asks the smile returning to his face.

"No," I say quickly.

"Oh wow Sam Puckett is ticklish," he says as he reaches over and grabs my hip again. I try to pull away but this time he holds me close with his other hand. He jumps on top of me to hold me down. I start laughing and screaming uncontrollably. I yell at him to stop but he keeps tickling me. Suddenly I flip to one side and throw him off the bed. He lands on his back and scrambles up to one knee and looks back at me.

"You're going to pay for that Benson." I say in a low growl.

Freddie just smiles and says. "I know," before jumping to his feet and running for the door. I chase after him. He runs out of the room and down the hall with me right behind. He takes a sharp right down another hall toward the hotel's small weight room. Once in he jumps over a stack of dumb bells stumbles to the door and runs out side. He's running toward the pool. He tries to lose me by running around the Jacuzzi, but I cut him off by leaping over it, tackling him into the pool. We both splash into the water. I feel the water churn as Freddie swims up.

I swim to the top of the water and meet face to face with Freddie. "I win!" I say putting my arms around him.

"So, is this what I have to look forward to." he say.

"Yep,"

* * *

><p>I Finished them hooking up, and nothing much besides that happened other than a little Seddie. I wrote this chapter like three times until I ended on this one. On one it got all jumbled and lost track of the store. In another things got a little to hot between Freddie and Sam and i thought that it was a little soon for that.<p>

By now you know the drill, but i still fell i should ask. Please review.


	22. Home Comming

**Sam's POV**

The rattle from the heater fills the silent car. Me and Freddie are quite, but it's a different quite than before. It's like we don't need to talk. I'm sitting sideways in my seat. With my sock covered feet in Fredison's lap. I have his coat over my solders; he offered it to me when I said I was cold. I made fun of him for being such a nub but took it anyway. Of course I didn't even think to bring a jacket, but than again I didn't have a crazy mom that would make me where one when it was 80°F out side.

Every once and a wile he looks over at me, gets a big grin on his face and looks back at the road.

"What is it?" I ask.

"I was just thinking about how happy I am." he says squeezing my foot. "Part of me thought that this would never happen."

"What would never happen."

"Us"

"So there's an us now?" I ask playfully.

"Yeah, I mean isn't there."

I lean over and give him a small kiss on the lips. "Yeah." I say in a low whisper as I pull away.

I sit back against the door and stretch my arms. "I can't wait to get back, have a nice hot shower and a nap." I say. I look back a Fredder and he doesn't look as happy as he did a second ago. "You OK?" I ask.

"There is something that we should talk about though," he says in a serious tone.

"What,"

"Well it's Jennifer, she has this weird thing about people who are together in her house."

"What do you mean?"

"Well one time when I was dating Alexa, her parents went out of town and she wanted to stay for a wile longer. So she ended up staying with me at Jeff and Jennifer's. Jennifer became so strict and for lack of a better word crazy, that Alexa had to go stay at Leah's."

"Wow"

"Yeah and I don't want things to get weird around the house so I was thinking maybe we don't tell anyone right away."

"Are you serious?"

"Yeah, it's just this is all still so new," he says gesturing between us. "And I don't want to add any extra stress to us."

"Ok, so we wont tell them right away."

"Thanks"

"But, Freddie you don't have to worry about us. I'm not going anywhere." he flashes me a smile, leans close to me and kisses me on the lips.

**Freddie's POV**

We pass Leah's house, which signals the home stretch of our trip. Sam pulls her feet off my lap and turns forward. This plan sucks. We've just got together and now we have to pretend that we aren't. All I want to do is hold her. I already feel cold from not being in contact with her. But I don't want things to get awkward between her and Jennifer. So for now this is the plan we have to stick with.

We pull up to the house and I see Jennifer, Tara and Joey standing at the bottom of the porch. I feel myself tense up at the sight of Joey. Not only do I not want him around Sam, but there's also the matter of me punching him that I have to deal with. I take a deep breath and settle myself. Sam taps me on the arm and motions to the porch. "Go talk to Jennifer and Tara. I'll handle Joey," she says. I don't say a word as she gets out of the car and grabs her small bag out of the back. I get out and walk over to the porch passing Joey as he walks to the car. We stair right at each other as we pass. I get to the porch and say hi to Tara then Jennifer. They start in with the questions, how'd it go, was she OK. To be honest I'm not paying attention, even though I was answering all of their questions. I was more interested in watching Sam and Joey. I can't hear them from here, but it doesn't look like Joey likes the conversation. Suddenly he storms off gets in his truck and leaves. Sam comes walking over to the rest of us.

"Hey," Sam says in a low tone.

"What was that all about?" Tara asks.

"I really don't want to talk about it." Sam says.

The rest of the day is filled with some pointless convocations and questions about the trip. I even talked to Jeff and Jennifer about me punching Joey. Although not much was sorted out, it was still good to get it out of the way. Sam and I didn't see much of each other all day. Wile I was dealing with my aunt and uncle, Sam was talking and playing with the girls.

After Jennifer put Chris to bed we all stayed up for a little wile longer just joking around and not talking about anything really. After a little Sam lets out a big yawn, says good night, and heads to her room. I stay up a little longer till every one else decides they should all go to bed. I'm the last one up the stairs. Everyone says one last goodnight before going into there rooms. I walk into my room and close the door behind me. I walk straight to the bathroom and walk to the far side and the other door. I knock softly and before I can finish the door swings open. Sam grabs me and pulls me into her room. We wrap our arms around each other. Sam starts to giggle, which is a first, as we start to kiss. Sam pulls back from the kiss, " Today was hard," she says in a very unsamish way.

"Come on, was it really that bad?" I ask.

"Your saying it was easy for you."

"Well no, but we have to keep this going for a little wile."

"I know it just sucks."

"I know. Wait I have an idea."

"What?"

"OK what of we try to sneak away for little moments throughout the day?"

"How?"

"We find a spot where no one goes, and we meet there and have time for us."

"That could work. Where should we meet?"

"Well right now I think we should meet here." I say as I lean in to kiss her, but suddenly I hear the knob to her door start to turn so I dive behind her dresser. Sam flops down on her bed trying to act natural.

I hear the door open slowly and a beam of light shoots to the other side of the room. I recognize a little voice coming from the door, "Sam," Chris says.

"Yeah, what's up honey?" Sam says in a soft voice.

"I heard a noise in my closet. I think there's a monster in there." Chris says, her voice shaking.

"OK, let mama take a look." Sam leaves the room. I look out from behind the dresser in time to see Sam grab Chris's hand and walk toward her room.

It makes me smile seeing how easy it seems Sam can deal with little kids. But Chris has to have the worst timing. This might not be so easy after all.

* * *

><p>OK here's the deal i really want to have a Christmas chapter. So i will try to have it up by tomorrow, but i am not promising anything. If i don't then i will put out a New Years one for sure.<p>

In case you don't hear from me Merry Christmas. Please review.


	23. A Day For Sam

**Sam's POV**

This morning I wake up to what sounds like someone wrestling a moose. I go down stairs to find Freddie dragging a Christmas tree in the front door. "Hi," he says out of breath.

"Hi?" I say questioningly.

" You want to give me a hand here?"

"Not really,"

"Sam."

"OK," I walk over and pick up the top of the tree. "Where did you get this thing?"

"I cut it down at the lot in town."

"You had to cut it down yourself?"

"Yeah, but that's part of the fun." He sticks the base of the tree in the stand. "Ok, you hold it steady while I tighten the bots.

"K," he hurries and tightens the stand to the tree. We stand back and look at the tree. He puts his arm around me. I look at him shocked that he would risk someone seeing us like this.

"Don't worry we're the only ones up" I take his lead and relax into his arms and rest my head on his solder. "Its a nice tree isn't it?"

"Yeah, and my first."

"Wait you've never had a Christmas tree before?" Freddie says in shock.

"No, I mean Christmas has never been that big a thing in my family."

"So you've never had a real Christmas?"

"I guess not."

"Well this year you'll have one, no better yet I will make this the best Christmas ever."

"OK bring it on" I say challenging him to make me a Christmas.

"Well OK then." He says as he moves his arms from around me and starts walking to the back of the house.

"Where are you going?" I ask.

"Well I have a lot of work to do if I'm going to pull this off by tomorrow. So I have to get started." Freddie walks off into the kitchen and I hear the back door open then close.

All day long Freddie keeps coming and going. He'll pop in for a few minutes then he leaves with someone and they don't come back for a few hours. When he comes back he takes someone else and leaves again. By the time night comes around everyone is at the house except Freddie. "Where's Freddie?" I ask Jennifer.

"I'm not sure," she says. "He said he might be back late, he said he was working on something, but wouldn't tell me what it was." Jennifer answers.

I stay up and wait for him to come home. It feels weird going to bed without him. We usually have a chance to say good night and spend some time together before we go to bed. Everyone else had gone to bed a few hours ago. I look out the back window and see him walking to the house. I open the back door and the ice cold air hits my face. I see Freddie has his hands crossed in front of his chest and he looks cold. I motion with my arms for him to hurry up. He speed walks the last few feet and I close the door behind him. "What are you doing out there it's freezing."

"Oh, it's not that bad," he says through chattering teeth.

"Come on," I say garbing his hand and pulling him up stairs and into my room. "Take your jacket off."

"What?"

"And your sweater." I ordered him. He takes off his jacket and takes forever getting off his sweater so I help him. "Now get into bed," I say pointing to my bed.

"I think I like where this is going. Is this my Christmas gift?" he says with a stupid grin on his face. I slap him in the back of the head.

"No you have to get warm or you'll get sick and body heat is the best way." he gets into the bed and I make him scoot to the far side wile I take off my sweater. Leaving me in just my sweats and a very tight white t-shirt. i slide into bed and wrap my arms around Freddie. His arms and hands are so cold they make me jump at first.

"Sorry." he says.

"It's ok, what where you doing out there all day?"

"Getting ready for Christmas."

"Yeah, and you don't think you getting sick will mess up your perfect Christmas."

"Not mine yours. And I'll be fine don't worry."

"Freddie, you're freezing"

"I actually feel much better now thanks." Freddie clicks the light on his pear phone and glances at the screen. "Hey Sam."

"Yeah."

"Merry Christmas." He leans over and gives me a kiss on the lips.

"Merry Christmas." I say back as we pull apart. We lay there for a wile till Freddie gets warm. "OK, you should probably go to your own room. We don't want anyone catching us like this."

"I don't care if they do."

"What"

" I want to wake up next to you on Christmas morning" I smile and give him a kiss.

"OK"

* * *

><p>Freddie and I wake up at the same time to an excited little girl running down the hall screaming at the top of her lungs that its Christmas. I look over to Freddie and he looks right into my eyes. No one looks at me the way he does. "Good morning." I say.<p>

"Merry Christmas," he says. "You have a busy day today."

"What do you mean?"

"You'll see," he says getting out of bed. "But first breakfast." he turns around and walks through the bathroom to his room. I get up and throw his clothes at him through the door. I get ready and go down stairs. I can smell eggs and bacon cooking. Chris is hovering around the tree going crazy over how many gifts she got. Tara is yawning and Jeff and Jennifer are both in the kitchen. After a little wile Freddie comes down and Breakfast is done we eat then everyone sits around the tree and Jeff passes out gifts. I'm shocked when two gifts are sent my way. I unwrap one and it's a new pair of boots like Jennifer's. I unwrap the second gift and it's a cowboy hat. I put them on and they fit great. After presents, Jeff walks up to me.

"So you've never had a real Christmas." He says. I shoot a look over to Freddie. I can't believe he told Jeff that.

"No I guess not." I say.

"Well get ready and meet me out by my truck."

"For what?"

"You'll see." is all he says before walking away. So I get ready with my new boots and hat. I slide on a nice heavy coat and go out to Jeff's Truck. "Lets go," he says.

"were are we goin?"

"You'll see." we drive for a wile and then turn off road. Jeff drives us out to the middle of a field. The ground is covered in a thin layer of snow and the trees in the distance have a slight dusting on their tops. In the middle of the field is an old beat up car, an old T.V, and a bunch of other stuff just sitting there. Jeff stops a good distance from everything and gets out of the truck.

"OK what are we doin here?" I say walking around to the front of the truck

"Well Sam this is something my Dad took me to do every Christmas. We'd drive out to the middle of nowhere like this and we'd blow stuff up. And that's what we're gona do."

"Are you serous?"

"Yes I am. The girls have never really been in to doing this, but something tells me your going to like it. Now I'm gona go blow up that T.V. over there. You stay here." Jeff runs over to the T.V. he lights a fuse and runs back to me. A few tense seconds tick by and then BOOM the T.V. jumps into the air and comes crashing back down. We both yell and celebrate. "OK now it's your turn. Go blow up that car over there." Jeff hands me a lighter. Without a word I run over and light the fuse and sprint back as fast as I can. The same tense felling from before fills me, as it seems like forever. Then BOoB BoOB the car blows and is covered in a huge fireball. Jeff laughs, "I put a little gas in that one for a better show. Come on I have a lot more stuff for you to destroy." We spend the rest of the morning blowing just about every thing you could think of up.

We start to drive back to the house but he keeps going past. "Where we going now?" I ask.

"I thought maybe you should go over to Leah's for a little wile, so she's not alone on Christmas."

"Yeah, I'd love to." Jeff drops me off at Leah's. I walk up to the door, knock three times and wait for Leah. She answers the door and doesn't look surprised to see me.

"Oh there you are. Lets go," she says rushing past me. I reach over to the door that she left open and close it for her. I turn around and see her running off with a large black bag. I chase after her.

"Where are we going and what's in the bag?" she runs around to the back of her house

"Just follow me" I follow around to the backyard and see half of Leah's back yard covered in ice.

"What's this?" I ask.

"Its a ice rink. Do you like it?"

"Sure, but how'd you do this?"

"I didn't, Freddie did. He kept coming by yesterday and spraying down my yard with a hose."

"Why?" Leah opens her bag and pulls out two pairs of ice skates.

"This is why. You do know how to skate right?"

"Yeah but I haven't in kind of a long time"

"You'll remember its like riding a bike." I sit down next to Leah on the trough and start to change into the skates she gave me.

"OK but why are we going to ice shake."

"One, it'll be fun and two, Freddie asked me to skate with you."

"Why would he want you to ice skate with me?" I ask not understanding what is going on.

"I'm not sure. All I know is yesterday He shows up and asks me what my favorite memory of Christmas is. I told him skating on the pond behind the house I grew up in. then he asked me if I would share it with you." so this is what Freddie was doing all day yesterday. He setup the whole day just for me. I can't believe it; no one has ever done anything like this for me.

I finish putting on the skates and we spent most of the afternoon skating around the little rink. At first I'm a little shaky on my feet, but soon it's like I never stopped. The feel of the uneven ice as the old skates leave a trail to where I've been. The cold air brushing against my cheek. I feel like a little kid. Leah wisps by me, a grin spreads across my face as I dig in and push my self forward. Leah sees me pick up pace and takes off with surprising speed. I chase her around and we play on the ice till the sun hits the ground.

"Come on," Leah says. "We should get going. Jennifer has a big dinner planed and we shouldn't miss it." I take my time getting off the ice. Leah tells me to bring the skates in when I'm done. She heads in the house to change. I sit back down on the trough and start changing back into my boots. I look out to the ice and think of Freddie. He really does love me doesn't he? He did all this so I could have some good Christmas memories. I just wish he was here to share them with me.

Leah pokes her head out the back door and calls over to me, snapping me out of my thoughts. "Sam are you ready to go?"

Me and Leah pull up to the house and I see Freddie sitting on the porch. He stands up as I walk toward him. Leah passes us by, giving us a funny look like she knows something.

"I'll just go right into the house. You two take your time," she says as she climes the porch steps. I look at Freddie.

"Dose she know?" I ask, gesturing between me and Freddie.

"You should have figured out by now, Leah knows everything." Freddie says with that little smile he gets where one side of his lips rises higher than the other. I love that smile. " So how was your day?"

"It was pretty awesome I just wish I got to spend some of it with you."

" Well the night's not over yet. We still have Christmas dinner and maybe a few more surprises." Surprises? What else could he do? "Come on dinners almost ready" he turns and we walk Side by side to the door.

The dinner is amazing. Jennifer knows how to cook. She made these mash-potatoes that are so light and buttery, with the best gravy I ever had. And the ham, there aren't words to describe it. I start to cry just thinking about the tender meat and the sweet crust. And I get to sit next to Freddie at the table. Throughout dinner we reach under the table and hold each other's hand. After dinner every one left the dishes in the kitchen. Jeff and Chris fell asleep on opposite sides of the coach Leah said her goodbyes and left and Tara went into the kitchen to help Jennifer clean up.

Freddie pulls me over to the front door and speaks in a whisper, " grab your jacket and lets go." I give him a funny look but I grab my jacket not fully understanding and follow him out side.

"Where are we going?" I ask as we walk around the house.

"Christmas isn't over yet I still have one more surprise, " he says.

"What is it?"

"Just trust me," he says reaching his hand out to me. I take his hand, give him a smile and we start walking into the grove. As we get further from the house the cold air starts to get to me. I can see my breath in the dim light from the moon hiding behind the dense clouds and I can feel my cheeks turning red. Freddie must notice how cold I'm getting because he pulls me close and raps his arm around me. I get in close and rap my arms him. "So did you have fun today?"

"Yeah lot." I look him strait in the eyes and a smile spreads across his face. He leans in and gives me a kiss on my fore head.

"OK we're here," he says as he turns around to face me.

"What is it?"

"Just stay here." he starts to walk away.

"Freddie?"

"Just trust me." he flashes that grin of his and I can't help feel loved. He turns and disappears into the dark trees.

When did I get so sappy? He makes me crazy and. . . Girly. All he has to do is smile and I fall apart. What happened to the days when I was tuff, when nothing got to me? Maybe I'm going soft.

Suddenly, all around me the trees ignite. It starts behind me and runs past lighting one tree after another. The shimmer of thousands of tiny stars that start at the trunk of each tree and wined up to the canopy and jump from one tree to the next. They form a hall that stretches to Freddie, who is walking toward me. I start making my way to him. As we get closer together I realize I have gone soft and it's because of Freddie. I changed for him without even knowing it. I stop as we come toe to toe. I look into his eyes and he looks back at me in the way only he dose. He's totally worth it. "You did all this?" I ask.

"Merry Christmas Sam." he pulls me in and places a soft kiss on my lips.

"I love you." I say as a light snow starts to fall around us.

"I love you too."

* * *

><p>i know it's been a wile since I last updated and for that I'm sorry. if you remember last you heard from me i mentioned a Christmas special. well i hope you have some Christmas spirit left because once i began it i couldn't stop. so even though it's late i hope you enjoy. please review.<p> 


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